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Are the Murderball guys sending the wrong message?

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    Are the Murderball guys sending the wrong message?

    Every interview I've seen with these guys they alway talking about how great their life is in the chair. They even hate it when they are out & people ask them if they need help, they flip out & say they don't need help. Those of you that have seen these interviews know what I mean. I very happy when someone opens a door for me or gives me a little extra help. They seem to represent a very narrow view of how quads are to the public. It has me a little worried. I have been staying away from the movie because I have not liked what I've seen from these guys.
    "Some people say that, the longer you go the better it gets the more you get used to it, I'm actually finding the opposite is true."

    -Christopher Reeve on his Paralysis

    #2
    I have no problem when people open doors for me, but it does bother me when people walk up behind me and you start pushing me because they assume I need help. I also don't mind when people ask if I need some help but when I say no thank you, and they continue to ask me, Are you sure? I can do it for you. My favorite one is why do you feel you need to do everything for yourself? Let other people help you. Excuse me you do not know me get out of my face and don't tell me what I need to do. I also think it's how people approach may sometimes that sets me off in my not wanting their help. Don't bend down in my face, speak a little louder than normal yet in that oh you poor dear little girl childish talk. I'm an adult, speak to me like one.
    www.cawvsports.org
    The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same. ~ Don Juan Matus
    We are Virginia Tech… We must laugh again… No one deserves a tragedy… We are strong, and brave, and innocent, and unafraid…We are better than we think and not quit what we want to be…We are the Hokies…We will prevail, we will prevail, we will prevail. We ARE Virginia Tech! ~ Nikki Giovanni

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      #3
      I know what you mean, Norm. On the Jackass Murderball episode, Zupan said he wouldn't change a thing. I was aghast. My son said "Well, they love the sport." I said I've never loved a sport that much and I never will.

      It's made them celebs and it got them on Jackass. I'd rather have us all fully functional though.

      I never mind people offering help except when they grab the door I'm leaning on (quad walking w/ 1 forearm crutch.) That messes me up bigtime.

      There will always be people that are happy to be in their chairs, I guess. Just like there will always be people willing to play wheelchair cattleprod jousting with Steve-O and Johnny Knoxville driving. Ack-not me.
      Blog:
      Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

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        #4
        Norm, this is a topic i've thought about also....im going to start a thread in the life forum...they get more traffic....hope you dont mind....but i'd like to hear everyone's response...

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          #5
          There have been threads like this before. They are usually in the Cure Forum and most responders are absolutely aghast that anyone is happy with their current situation. What is being missed is that the two points of view are totally compatible. It isn't one or the other. You can be happy with your current life and also be interested in getting a cure. I personally feel it is healthier.
          As far as showing the outside world that life in a wheelchair is livable. You guys can't have it both ways. You can't have a great movie that shows that quads have a life and are actually humans too and a movie that shows life in a chair is living hell. Sorry, IMO the movie as is, is important for exactly the message that it gives. What are you afraid of, AB's will not see it and decide that no money should be spent on SCI Research. They will see it and decide that, "gee, these guys are human with human emotions, desires, needs, challenges, etc." Sports is important in this country and that makes this movie even better since so many can identify. Why not contact Zupan and Co. and get them to come out and talk up research when they are being interviewed.
          My opinion,
          Carl

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            #6
            Murderball; first I must say I have not seen the movie yet, but I’m sure I will buy it when available on Amazon etc. I agree with the thoughts you guys have here on this tread, but we shall remember that there is plenty of healthy and walking people that feels their life is not worth living and miserable as well – that is the hardest part for me to understand. I’m just waiting for the Murderball team going downhill skiing.

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              #7
              Originally posted by Norm
              Every interview I've seen with these guys they alway talking about how great their life is in the chair. They even hate it when they are out & people ask them if they need help, they flip out & say they don't need help. Those of you that have seen these interviews know what I mean. I very happy when someone opens a door for me or gives me a little extra help. They seem to represent a very narrow view of how quads are to the public. It has me a little worried. I have been staying away from the movie because I have not liked what I've seen from these guys.
              I DONT WANT ANYONES HELP either, IT IRRITATES THE SHIT OUT OF ME WHEN ASKED. i thought most crips were this way....i like the view they are sending. fits my attitude.

              stupid question example. I went to the mall for cigars after work. i always park at the back of the lot or at least away from other cars, so knowone parks to close to me, i dont ever use crip spots. as im wheeling to the doors this lady asks me why i dont use handicapped spots, i looked at her and said i push faster than u can walk, those spots are for the truly disabled, like the 500 pd person. she laughed, but she definately got my sarcasm, and my point.
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                #8
                if i remeber right in the movie a newly injured guy in the hopsital was asking what happens if he regains enough movement that he doesnt qualify to play.
                the answer from the murderball player was like ,, hey leaving the ranks of murderball players due to more function is a something he wished he could do
                cauda equina

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                  #9
                  Agreed

                  Darn, Carl - you hit the nail right on the head. Well said, man.

                  Originally posted by carl
                  There have been threads like this before. They are usually in the Cure Forum and most responders are absolutely aghast that anyone is happy with their current situation. What is being missed is that the two points of view are totally compatible. It isn't one or the other. You can be happy with your current life and also be interested in getting a cure. I personally feel it is healthier.
                  As far as showing the outside world that life in a wheelchair is livable. You guys can't have it both ways. You can't have a great movie that shows that quads have a life and are actually humans too and a movie that shows life in a chair is living hell. Sorry, IMO the movie as is, is important for exactly the message that it gives. What are you afraid of, AB's will not see it and decide that no money should be spent on SCI Research. They will see it and decide that, "gee, these guys are human with human emotions, desires, needs, challenges, etc." Sports is important in this country and that makes this movie even better since so many can identify. Why not contact Zupan and Co. and get them to come out and talk up research when they are being interviewed.
                  My opinion,
                  Carl

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I noticed the way he made that point about him not wanting help loud and clear on Jay Leno. I thought to myself whoa bud most people have no idea what we go through and what it takes for us to get around, that's why they ask if we need help or not. I also watched the Trailer for the movie and it almost sounds like they make people that ask if they want help out to be idiots. The able bodied people that watch the movie and the millions that watched Jay Leno that night may never ask a person in a wheel chair if they need help again, because who wants to feel like an idiot. Sure many times they ask or try to help when help isn't needed but I think it's better than a door slamming shut in front of me. If it weren't for people asking if I needed help I would have been screwed a few times. I respect the people that ask because lot's of people wouldn't even bother asking. Before my accident I had a friend that was a para and he didn't mind me doing some things for him and other times I would ask if he needed the extra push up a curb and he would give me a dirty look, shit I didn't know any better. After a while it seemed he got irritated by me so I stayed away. Years later he killed himself in a bathtub, turns out he needed help more than ever. I don't think there is anything wrong with people trying to help, it's better than a dickhead that won't move out of my way and looking at me like I should back up.

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                      #11
                      A message is a message regardless of what side you're on. Attention to us in the sci community is a good thing. Knowledge is power. Carl, however, does make some very valid points. My general question is: Are we better or worse off because of the attention brought by Murderball the movie and the sport? Imo, yes.


                      As far as the public display, personally, I disagree with Zupan. Maybe he's convinced himself and he's trying to, and succeeding, coerce his teammates but deep down, without the paralympics and the fifteen minutes of fame of quad rugby would he rather be running down a soccer field without the spotlight or pushing his chair with it? Well, I think, as a dedicated athlete myself, the answer's pretty easy - he'd rather be running than pushing.

                      We'll have to wait and see how this plays out over time. My guess is, when a cure arrives, Zupan will be just as aggressive in getting on line as he is in stating that he doesn't need help.

                      I guess the real concern I have, and which is being horribly neglected, are those quads who's injuries are so high or complete thatb they are being ignored. Not every quad can play murderball - so is it equal? Murderball is great for those with some upper extremity movement but what about all the rest? (many CC members come to mind).

                      A conscience to all that surrounds sci is necessary and needed. I believe that Murderball, in its own way and minus the personal opinions, is helping to bridge the gaps and garner support.

                      Onward and upward.
                      Last edited by Chris Chappell; 3 Aug 2005, 4:56 PM.

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                        #12
                        the evaluating point sys goes down to .5. i have played against some guys who didnt move real well. quads from c4 down can play.
                        myself for instance inc c4/5, im a strong full back type, i open up the holes for our ball handlers, why because im big and strong, but have only average speed and weak hands.,
                        Last edited by fuentejps; 3 Aug 2005, 7:53 PM.
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                        c4/5 inc funtioning c6. 28 yrs post.
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                          #13
                          I think those dudes are great. much respect. have you seen the jackass with them...funny as hell...any body want to play blackeye contest contact me
                          Has it been five years yet? ..........

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                            #14
                            I saw the movie and I think they are not so black/white in saying the don't need help. They do express frustration when people ask/say dumb things to them, without thinking. Like helping you get back home from grocery shopping. As one of the guys said " I wouldn't have come out shopping if I couldn't get home again". That is a big difference between merely refusing help.

                            And if it get the public to think about what disabled people can do, rather than react without reflection what they cannot do, I think that it a good thing.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Sure they may be saying life in a chair is great, but at least theyre not being like other movies saying life isnt worth it anymore kill me now. Theyre showing we can do stuff on our own and enjoy it too.
                              ~Ashley~

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