Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Intercourse causes AD

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Intercourse causes AD

    Since my accident in 1975 my penis has been hyper sensitive. I can get an erection but stimulating that erection by hand or during sex racks my stomach, legs, chest in tight cramps and then ADysreflexia. Before my accident like most teenagers I masturbated 4-6 times a day. As a C4 quad my hands don't work well enough to masturbate. The past 29 years have been a mental nightmare. The DESIRE is still there but I have no way to achive the physical release. Even if I did, the pain is there waiting. Any ideas on how to overcome this? I battle it daily in my mind. I don't take any meds for pain or spatisity. Wine helps some but not enough. I would prefer to be not whacked out on drugs or booze during these intimate moments. I regard sex as something more than just grinding two bodies together. I want to be there in the moment with my partner... am I asking for the impossible?

    Rusty
    www.rustyreeves.com

    #2
    Rusty,

    This is kind of off the point but ever since I read Boivie's comments about a few CP patients who report increased pleasure, I have wondered what he meant.

    Do you mean your penis is hypersensitive to pleasure/stimulation, or do you mean it is hypersensitive in the way it leads to AD?

    Ron Tasker also wrote about pains associated with orgasm, but he was discrete and didnt' go into it.

    These articles are in the Textbook of Pain.

    Has your AD changed in any way over the past 29 years?

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by dejerine
      Do you mean your penis is hypersensitive to pleasure/stimulation, or do you mean it is hypersensitive in the way it leads to AD?

      It is hypersensitive leading to AD. Stimulation causes the severe spasms then the AD kicks in.

      --------

      Has your AD changed in any way over the past 29 years?
      No, I only have very rare occasions of it.
      www.rustyreeves.com

      Comment


        #4
        Rusty, if it is only on rare occasions (that you experience AD due to sexual stim), do you think that it has more to do with your "anticipation" of possible pain associated with sexual stimulation more than the actual experience? I ask about this because of your previous comment on it being a "mental nightmare" and "I battle it daily in my mind". Or do you avoid sexual interaction as much as possible because of the pain that always(?) results from it?

        Comment


          #5
          no it's not anticipation, I have the same senseitivity only one one side of it,But I don't get spasm's just can't touch it, But I can't get a erection, The DESIRE is very much still there!!! But NO way of releiving it! that is why I get very Down and blue all the time
          It's not easy being a man when your thing's don't work.

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by chick:

            Rusty, if it is only on rare occasions (that you experience AD due to sexual stim), do you think that it has more to do with your "anticipation" of possible pain associated with sexual stimulation more than the actual experience? I ask about this because of your previous comment on it being a "mental nightmare" and "I battle it daily in my mind". Or do you avoid sexual interaction as much as possible because of the pain that always(?) results from it?
            It isn't from anticipation... its from the touch (by hand, mouth, vaginal) that sets of the full body spasm. That spamn results in AD. Its been a mental nightmare simply because I'm a very sexual person now living a very unsexual life.

            My legs are very spastic and while in my chair I can trick them into kicking by taking a very deep breath. Also when I'm in bed on my back and I haven't moved in a while if I yawn or reach to click the tv channel my legs go ape shit for about 10-15 seconds. I have a strap that goes over my legs at the knee caps and hooks on the side rails of my bed that hold them in place.

            Even after 29 years as a quad my legs remain fairly toned. They are very strong... and sometimes pop the hooks on the strap. I think this uncontroled movement has helped me avoid bed sores (knock on wood).

            And yes, sex for me is a rare thing due to this pain. It is also rare because of SCI. In general I don't think people view people in wheelchairs as sexual beings.
            www.rustyreeves.com

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by duge:

              that is why I get very Down and blue all the time
              It's not easy being a man when your thing's don't work.
              Duge, I hear you man. I know what you mean. I have become very skilled at going down on a woman but not having the intercourse makes you a one trick pony. I'm not stupid, I know women enjoy the clitoral sex but they also crave that cock deep inside them... as it is now, I can't provide that. It makes me even hesitant to flirt.
              www.rustyreeves.com

              Comment


                #8
                This may sound crazy, but we do this when Chad is hypersensitive due to a yeast infection .... can you put lidocaine on your penis to deaden the sensations? That might allow you 15-20 minutes of time to have sex and masturbate without the physical senstations of it - you would at least have the visualation of it and be able to have penetration sex with a woman.

                I assume you have lidocaine around for cathing? It's worth a try - just rub it all over your penis and wait 5 minutes, then try?

                Just a thought ... crazy as it may be ...

                Zillazangel / Ami

                (note: we don't have sex when he has a yeast infection! but we put the lidocaine on him to stop him from twitching around to stop the itching and the resulting AD)
                Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by zillazangel:

                  This may sound crazy, but we do this when Chad is hypersensitive due to a yeast infection .... can you put lidocaine on your penis to deaden the sensations? That might allow you 15-20 minutes of time to have sex and masturbat

                  I assume you have lidocaine around for cathing? It's worth a try - just rub it all over your penis and wait 5 minutes, then try?

                  Just a thought ... crazy as it may be ...

                  Zillazangel / Ami

                  (note: we don't have sex when he has a yeast infection! but we put the lidocaine on him to stop him from twitching around to stop the itching and the resulting AD)
                  Ami,
                  I'm fortunate that my bladder empties on its own thus no cathing. The Lidocaine sounds promising. I don't have any but I can talk to my urologist about getting some. What do you do, rub it on the entire penis and ball area? Since it numbs I suppose you wear rubber gloves when appling it to the skin? Perhaps it and some Cialis to firm up and maintain the erection might work. Thank you for the suggestion.

                  Rusty
                  www.rustyreeves.com

                  Comment


                    #10
                    That sound's good I use to use it when I had to cath,



                    But I can't get a erection!
                    Not a bit, Only about a fourth with Cialis but not enough to even think about penetration.

                    That is why alot of times I say that I don't even feel like a man anymore,
                    Rusty I know exactly what you mean about a lady wanting a cock!
                    there is just none here to give.

                    I'd do just sbout anything to have that one thing back in my life.
                    I just feel like I am in a emotional misery that can't be released! Sorry if I sound like I am venting.

                    Doug

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Yes, I wear vinyl gloves and rub the lidocaine all over his penis and scrotum area. When he has a yeast infection, it gives him a raging hard on for some reason, so I use the lidocaine to kill the erection actually - that's how I know I've been successful in deadening the itching sensations even though he can't consciously feel the itching. But for you, the sexual stimulation may be enough to maintain your erection, but the lidocaine may keep the pain/AD away. I hope it works - update if you feel comfortable doing so, or private topic me. I'm curious to know if this works for you.

                      Doug, I'm so sorry nothing seems to work for you.... how frustrating that must be for you. Have you ever considered harnesses and dildos? Open minded women don't care how sex happens, it's about enjoying yourself, and speaking for myself, we certainly get creative. I hope that wasn't offensive to you to suggest that, but it's just a thought....

                      Ami (a rather adventuresome person in the sex dept if you can't tell already! lol!)

                      p.s. I'm happily engaged by the way, I'm not flirting!!! Just clarifying. [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img]
                      Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Ami
                        In no way was it offensive!!!!!!!! I just done't know what to do, maybe have it removed? not good for anything !
                        Like I said if Only for one night I could have it back....but..

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Hi and sorry to hear of your problem.I just wanted to mention that women,at least I know I do,can suffer the same exact type of symptoms you are describing(minus the penis of course,lol)Since the surgery from hell, that caused all of my spinal cord damage,my sex life has also become a total nightmare.And it really,really sucks!!among other things, I suffered significant damage to the thalamic tract and sympathetic nervous system.The thalamic damage caused what is called Brown-Sequard syndrome.This causes loss of sensory from just under my R breast, over to the midline and all the way down to the bottom of my foot on the R side.The really maddening thing about this is that it also cuts exactly down the middle of the vaginal area as well.while i can feel even light touch on the R side, when you stick a needle into the skin there, all I feel is the sensation not the pain.I also will feel hot as cold and cold as hot.But since I have lost this 'fine touch" it makes it virtually impossible to actually have an orgasm.It also will cause me great pain even when I try to acheive one as I feel changes like it could be closer and closer, but as soon as that happens(in women, don't know about men)we will usually get these 'waves"?of "something" that feels like it is building?Unfortunetly, with every wave that used to be pleasure,is now a nasty wave of more of a pain instead.It comes from just outside the vaginal area and will kind of go in then up into the very low abdomen area.God this Sucks!!you know, it is bad enough that we have to suffer horrible levels of pain and disabilities,why is the one and only and most 'special' thing that you can possibly share with the one person you love most in the whole wide world,also taken from us? I would gladly take on more pain someplace else if i could just have this one special thing back that I could still share with my husband of almost 24 years.even at twenty three years, we still had a great sex life.i feel so very badly for my husband as this is not fair to him either you know?while we can still be rather creative, that one very special part is gone now and it just really makes me rather sad,and angry at times too.i really DO know just how you all feel,really.just remember, this happens with women too.i really do hope that you find something that will allow you once again to feel that feeling with no pain.good luck,Marcia

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Firesmurf,

                            I am very interested in temperature reversal. Would you be kind enough to say a little more about what "hot as cold and cold as hot" is like. Do you ever feel both together?

                            Comment


                              #15
                              The idea of Lidocaine is probabley not a good idea, in addition to deading the nerve sensation in your penis is will also deaden the nerve sensations of your partner. I have also heard that the use of lidocaine can be bad for the heart as it works its way into the bloodstream through your skin.
                              "Life is about how you
                              respond to not only the
                              challenges you're dealt but
                              the challenges you seek...If
                              you have no goals, no
                              mountains to climb, your
                              soul dies".~Liz Fordred

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X