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    a pain vent

    I try to stay out of here but...the last few weeks have been non stop agony. Nothing seems to relieve it. I really don't know what else to do.

    My daughter is the only thing that keeps me on the earth.

    I am so sick of this burning/stinging/rawness/cold/hot/on fire and it just doesn't stop. Trying to explain it to people is useless. My family and people around me don't understand how one minute I can be sitting normal and the next the tears are coming. I am not crazy. It is not depression. It is pain and if you are lucky to not have it then count your blessings.

    I am not lazy and just because I get around better does not mean that I should or could be working a job. I am not living off the government. I paid into the system to draw my social security and to get my Medicare. I worked when I could and that was when I could concentrate and my pain was not as great as it is today.

    I get tired of wanting/trying to concentrate and it just doesn't come. I just can't stand it anymore. I read a magazine and can't remember what I have read and the same thing with a movie.

    Is it the humidity? Is it stress? Is it age? I don't know....but death can't be much worse.
    T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

    My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

    #2
    i feel it too...............

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      #3
      I think it is stress, age and the weather + overuse. It is nothing to do with the weather and the age, but you can try to sleep enough, stress down and relax as much as possible. I don't have to say anymore because you know what I mean and I know how you feel
      TH 12, 43 years post

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        #4
        I've found I've hit a concrete wall too ... I'm still stubborn enough to try and knock it down ... but it's got me down and out for now.

        Aging like this is hellish - that is for sure. HGH should be standard treatment after 20yrs of paralysis!
        Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

        T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

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          #5
          I've only been a quad officially since my first surgery in 2006.....and it seems like a lifetime. The nueropathy started shortly after....and gets worse every year. Stress, the weather, illness or injury, over doing it, bowel problems, and the list goes on for things that make it worse....more intense!

          I'm sorry DD and Jenn......this pain is just plain ugly. Mine gets worse as time goes by. I've been going to a pain clinic now for over a year. I go monthly...I went today. A change of meds again. From hydrocodone to percacet for break through...and next month I'm required to see the doctor....the nurse wants him to up the time released morphine. Something has got to give.....before I give up.

          Things went from bad to worse with the leg problems.....and then losing the use of my right hand was topper....oh, I can't forget the skin on my toosh getting so bad from sitting it tore, and does'nt want to heal either. But the burning has just got me down. It's so hard to lay down and get any sleep.

          I can't concentrate anymore DD. I use to love reading books. Now I have a hard time even trying to hold one. Not being able to work anymore sucks. I worked for years too. What you get on SSDI is a joke. I'd much rather be working.

          I hope you catch a break soon. I hate to think of you....or anyone feeling this way everyday.

          Comment


            #6
            Yep. It sucks for sure!!!!
            L1 Complete - Injury 3/12/06 - Grateful to be alive!!!!

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              #7
              I was up three days straight Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I am not overusing my legs. I have cut way back compared to what I was doing a couple of months ago in Virginia. It is to the point, I am not able to tolerate socks or pants sometimes or even covers touching me some nights anymore. I have never been that way.

              Ativan/Topamax/5mg Oxy does calm it some though but I don't want to be unable to function with more pain medications than the low dose I am on now.

              I am still trying to figure out where my final destination is going to be. It looks like I am going back to Colorado. I was just happier there than at any time in life. I have a friend going with me. So I am hoping the dry air and change of scenery plus being back in the mountains where I was happy does help this excruciating feeling I am experiencing now. I am hoping I can get back into my photography even though I can't work, I can do something.

              I had rented an apartment here and kept hyperventilating. I just don't think being here is what I need. Finding an accessible affordable apartment has been so stressful too. I am going to go back with my plan to get my RV. That was my original plan when I sold my house.

              Plus my Osteopathic physician's are all out there and i liked them. If there is something going on new....she will find it.


              I have thought about you often Trudy...I want to come visit maybe next week. Can you PM me a phone number?
              T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

              My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

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                #8
                I don't know how these things work have journaled for 7 years off and on to minimize my pain and all I got from it is writers cramps, attempt at humor.

                strength

                ket
                Kindly,

                The Ketamine Kitty

                All the tears, all the pain, all the rage through the night (apolgies to the rewrite) RR

                Next time I die make sure I'm gone,
                don't leave 'em nothing to work on JT

                And I ain't nothin but a dream JM

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                  #9
                  lol @ bollefen - you still have it!
                  Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

                  T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by bollefen View Post
                    I don't know how these things work have journaled for 7 years off and on to minimize my pain and all I got from it is writers cramps, attempt at humor.

                    strength

                    ket
                    You are killing trees Bill...buy a computer to journal LOL
                    T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

                    My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I'm not a crier. Or a screamer. Probably a bad thing, as I don't look like I'm in the pain I'm in.
                      Alan

                      Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

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