Suicide

[rdf]

If my family suggested that I was a burden and the like, as rdf suggests, I would have done it long ago. Sorry, that is how I see it.

That isn't what I wrote about, Whiskers. Not at all, and I'm sorry you see it that way. It would be a very cold and uncaring family that would go to a member of their family and tell them they were a burden, so please commit suicide. If this is the impression you got from my above words, then I maybe I should delete the post....because to believe I suggested what you think is just wrong.

Maybe some people don't have the "happiness gene," as this article suggests can be helpful in stressful times. Although it states it's just one factor in many for finding and attaining happiness.

Happiness Is Partly Inherited

The key to happiness may lie in your genes.

Psychologists at the University of Edinburgh and the Queensland Institute for Medical Research in Australia have found that happiness is partly determined by personality traits that are largely hereditary, along with your situation in life.

The researchers used a personality test called the Five-Factor Model on more than 990 twin pairs. Matching that with happiness data taken from the pairs, they found that people who do not excessively worry, and who are sociable and conscientious tend to be happier.

The research, detailed in the March issue of the journal Psychological Science, identified evidence for common genes that result in the personality traits that predispose people to happiness, the researchers said.

continued

[Ozy'sMom]

Dear Friends:
Today was a day that I found the strength to catch up on the posts. All this talk about what to call the sticky was tough to read. I am ambivalent about it, but in the end, as Clay's mom, I believe that it should be called what it is being called. There in nothing anyone could have said or done to stay Clay's hand from taking his life. To him it was the greatest act of control left to him. If I were to try to explain or justify this to anyone, there would be myriad comments convicingly to the contrary. They would all miss the point in a sense. Clayton did not want to live. The book that he wrote and left behind to be shared with others who suffer as he did, is so graphic and painful to read that it makes me nauseous. Yet, it is all exactly as it happened. I was there and tried to help him navigate his care and to learn to handle bowel and urine function. It was so very hard, as many of you already know. He never held back a word about what he did or how to anyone. If he can speak so utterly truthfully, with all the embarassment and pain it caused him to be so graphic, then how can I shy from the word that it is... he committed suicide. If Clay were a different person, he would not have gone this route. Anyone who seeks to know more suicide this is probably thinking of it at one level or another. To me we owe it to those who went before us to help wherever we can. If it took a desperate or scared person even a minute longer to find this site because it was couched in euphamistic language, who knows what that effect might be? There is a split second from unconsciousness to death. In that second, there is no turning back...
I feel all the pain and fear that you all feel. The word suicide is so painful to me it hurts to type it. However, for me, Dr. Wise lives up to his name when he made this decision to name the site as he did. I am not one bit ashamed or embarassed about Clay's decision. Sadness is not the same as shame. I just wanted to share my take on this if it helps anyone... God bless you all! Ozy's Mom

[wheelchairTITAN]

MY Saturday gift to my CC brothers and sisters ...

"Incredible You!: 10 Ways to Let Your Greatness Shine Through"

Reading Ozzy'sMom made me remember a book that I share with my students. Just the cover of this book makes me smile ... it's content was written for children but it really is for each of here at CC as much as it is for young persons.

So my gift to everybody who reads this thread is a free smile from me to you!

You can give yourself an incredible gift by owning this book and just enjoying it. It can bring a smile to your face and your being if you will let it and perhaps on those days when it is needed it will bring some inner strehgths.

William

Authour: Dr. Wayne W. Dyer Illustrator: Kristina Tracy
Published: December 15, 2005
Published By:Hay House, Incorporated
ISBN:1401907822

[Whiskers]

rdf, I wish you hadn't deleted your post. You are entitled to your opinion. I am sorry if you felt that I disrespected you in any way. I too have deleted my post and will not comment again. Carry on....

[Tiger Racing]

I deleted what I wrote

Well, that sux.

C.

[Whiskers]

Deleted.... Sorry...I did say that I wouldn't comment any further......

[betheny]

RDF, on the contrary, you seem plenty articulate to me.

[bcsimpsons]

RDF,
I actually read your whole post before you deleted it and thought it was worded nicely. I came back a few minutes later and it was gone. Please don't feel you don't have the right to an opinion.

Whiskers,
Same goes for you. This is why it is a public board. If people didn't give their opinions, this site would be pretty boring.

Becky,
Chicago

[rdf]

Whiskers, please don't think my deletion had anything to do with your posts. I like your posts. I deleted my words because after personal reflection, I felt that they might seem offensive to some disabled people, and might give others new avenues to approach such a drastic decision as suicide if they've already made up their minds - after all, people change their minds all the time, and I don't feel I should offer them a reason not to - which my words might have been construed.

As I said, it's a sensitive subject, and I don't feel comfortable commenting on my experiences and how I feel.

Please keep posting, but this will be my last in this thread because of the turmoil within myself.

[Curt Leatherbee]

For people who read this thread here is my opinion about Suicide:/ Its a permanent solution to what is more than likely a temporary problem. Things can and do change. I tried to take myself out after the first few months I was injured 27 years ago, glad it did not work. My way of thinking changed as time passed by and those intense thoughts went away. Of course I think about it from time to time even now, I guess we all do, thats normal.

[doingtimeonmyass]

Suicide:/ Its a permanent solution to what is more than likely a temporary problem.

What's your take on a person tormented by a permanent problem such as a quadriplegic that cannot be physically independent? Even if the financial situation changed to overcome his/her basic needs, always having to involve another person when doing what they like sucks.

My biggest fear is having to live in a situation were I am significantly more disabled than I am now. If I survived a stroke for example, which left me more paralyzed, that's more than I would be willing to endure.

[ala]

Please be aware that the ideas and opinions expressed here are not those of professionals. Unless stated, those posting here do not have advanced degrees in Psychology or Psychiatry nor do they have expertise in the area of suicide. The ideas and opinions expressed here are drawn from personal experiences and concerns. Most of the members here are drawing on their experiences with disabilities, especially spinal cord injuries. Any people seriously contemplating suicide should seek out the help of experienced professionals.



Note: I know this was mostly stated in the OP, but I think it is useful to post this in the body of the thread too. There are people who might not read the first post because a seach engine brought them here.

[betheny]

What's your take on a person tormented by a permanent problem such as a quadriplegic that cannot be physically independent? Even if the financial situation changed to overcome his/her basic needs, always having to involve another person when doing what they like sucks.

My biggest fear is having to live in a situation were I am significantly more disabled than I am now. If I survived a stroke for example, which left me more paralyzed, that's more than I would be willing to endure.

I'm the age my mom was when she had a severe stroke. If I get hit with that stick, I might have to check out too. There are limits to what a person should be expected to endure.

Note: I am most def no type of mental health professional.

[bcsimpsons]

What's your take on a person tormented by a permanent problem such as a quadriplegic that cannot be physically independent? Even if the financial situation changed to overcome his/her basic needs, always having to involve another person when doing what they like sucks.

My biggest fear is having to live in a situation were I am significantly more disabled than I am now. If I survived a stroke for example, which left me more paralyzed, that's more than I would be willing to endure.

Totally agree. I mean one can only endure so much before they snap.

PS Also not a licensed health professional by any means of the word

Becky,
Chicago

[Curt Leatherbee]

Excellent suggestion, I agree it would be good to add something like this to the top of the page. Good idea.

I certainly dont claim to be an expert in this area, I've just always had a lot of common sense.

Even in the case of a high level quad, I've seen many do very well and find happyness. One of my friends married a beautiful younger woman and now has Twin boys, his life is very happy and complete. He has a great job also and a mind much better than most walking folks. He is wracked with neurogenic pain, but has found ways to manage it. He's about the most happy he has ever been he says.

Please be aware that the ideas and opinions expressed here are not those of professionals. Unless stated, those posting here do not have advanced degrees in Psychology or Psychiatry nor do they have expertise in the area of suicide. The ideas and opinions expressed here are drawn from personal experiences and concerns. Most of the members here are drawing on their experiences with disabilities, especially spinal cord injuries. Any people seriously contemplating suicide should seek out the help of experienced professionals.



Note: I know this was mostly stated in the OP, but I think it is useful to post this in the body of the thread too. There are people who might not read the first post because a seach engine brought them here.