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  • please stand

    My small town always amazes me. I went to court on Monday trying to get some support from my husband. We are the last case so the court is clear. I push up to the front when they call us and get beside my lawyer. My almost exhusband and his lawyer on their side. Baliff says could you please stand... Of course I remain in my wheelchair. He looks me right in the eye and says Maam Would you please stand? I was dumbfounded.
    He just saw us struggling becasue my chair couldn't fit behind the table well. I couldn't speak for a moment and finally said "I wish" My lawyer then says Sir she's in a wheelchair, she's paralyzed. He says I'm sorry then could you raise your right hand. Never even skipped a beat.
    Then I couldn't get on the stand to the mic because there was a step to get up there. The judge was very apologetic about this but I am wondering what the heck?
    Just my vent of the week.
    If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.


    Sometimes it is easier to widen doors than it is to open minds.

  • #2
    That is utterly disgusting. That lawyer of yours better make that whole episode an issue!
    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

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    • #3
      OH, you just came in the chair because you don't feel like walking, was that it. Damn, I would have been pissed and have a very hard time containing myself
      You though, the baliff probably was not opening his eye balls, if he had any so, he may not have realized you where paralyzed but sheesh, talk about common knowledge and being aware of others, oh no there not, duh.
      I had to go to court recently, over my tag or a credit card I never had and knew nothing about, they coudl not even show it was me. Anyway, this gurl came in very early 20's I guess using crutches. Wait a minute, all she did was carried them in her arms like a stick. It was so hard to not bust out laughing, she did not go out with them either. I get up there hobbling, of course, mine is real.
      Some people just do not have any common sense or sense at all. I am sorry this jerk was like that to you. Pisses me off how uncurtious everyday people can be to those with "disablilities".
      "I've got to keep breathing. Because tomorrow, the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?"

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      • #4
        airport security always assumes i can get up out of my chair. do i look 90?

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        • #5
          I feel uncomfortable sitting in my chair during the singing of our national anthem.
          God grant me the serenity
          to accept the things I cannot change;
          courage to change the things I can;
          and wisdom to know the difference.

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          • #6
            You'd think that a courtroom would be ADA wheelchair accessible. As an afterthought, maybe your lawyer should have cased out the courtroom in advance or talked to the bailiff, clerk of the court or judge beforehand.

            I've been paralyzed 27 years and whenever my brother comes over he still always putting stuff in my way or things up high on shelves etc. People are slow to change or just don't think. I don't know.
            "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle." - Philo of Alexandria

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            • #7
              I don't know, the baliff maybe has never been around or has no understanding of sci so assumed you could just stand. Then he was probably embarrassed or truly didn't know what else to say so said I'm sorry and quickly moved on. I know I slip up and say stuff a lot and later wish I handled it differently. Not saying he was in the right, but I tend to cut AB's some slack.

              Sorry that it was so inaccessible though, that's a small town for you.
              Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumble bee doesn't know that, so it goes on flying anyways--Mary Kay Ash

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              • #8
                Originally posted by lynnifer
                That is utterly disgusting. That lawyer of yours better make that whole episode an issue!
                An issue with who? Over what? The bailiff made a mistake. It's not like it's unheard of for someone that can walk to use a wheelchair to get around. You see loaner wheelchairs at malls and grocery stores all the time now. Whenever I fly, the airline asks me if I can stand or walk at all or if I need an aisle chair to get on the plane.

                The judge apologized for the court. What else do you think should have been done here?

                C.

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                • #9
                  I definitely understand how you feel addiesue. When I was in a hospital sitting in the ER waiting for a friend someone came out to me and told me that wheelchairs were reserved for patients. Well I explained to them that it was mine and yes I accepted their apology but It bothered me as well.

                  When I'm in a parking lot I try not to assume that the person who pops out of there car who hangs a disabled sticker is not disabled. Who am I to judge someone with a hidden disability, althoug I do have to fight that urge by the look of some of them. I expect the same from others who think I don't need my chair. There are ways to find things out without risking offending someone. I'm guessing considering the circumstances you were in maybe they thought you were just looking for the sympathy to help your case along. AND I guess that is my assumption for the day.

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                  • #10
                    I personally enjoy stuff like that, it's very funny.
                    I was at a corperate meeting for PCNA (PepsiCo North Am)when the CEO says she wants everyone to stand. I spoke aloud "Everyone"?
                    She smiled and just gave me a grin.
                    Rick Brauer or just call me - Mr B

                    http://www.riseadventures.org

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                    • #11
                      that response from the bailiff was a direct result of so many people nowadays who are capable of standing or walking and park their sorry asses in "free" wheelchair store etc. chairs taking advantage of the medicare system...i see them every day...give him a break, he prob hasn't seen someone who actually can't stand in court in a long time....

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Rbrauer
                        I personally enjoy stuff like that, it's very funny.
                        I was at a corperate meeting for PCNA (PepsiCo North Am)when the CEO says she wants everyone to stand. I spoke aloud "Everyone"?
                        She smiled and just gave me a grin.
                        I tend to agree. I can understand that some people - like addiesue - get upset, though.

                        I got asked while lying in hospital (I'd gone in because of dysreflexia) if I could get up and get onto another bed (by a porter, I hasten to add, who had no reason to know any of my details). I couldn't help but laugh and squeal "No - I'm paralyzed!".

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                        • #13
                          Some people just don't have a clue. While I was in-patient, and sent down for xrays, several times I was asked to stand up for the xray, or to "hop on the table" DUH! Read the chart please!
                          T7-8 since Feb 2005

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                          • #14
                            When I served as a juror some time ago, they had the juror's chair number four vacant (which I was) and had me sitting beside the jurror's box. It wasn't accessable, but they set things up so it worked out.
                            I found the court to be quite kind to me and treated me with respect.

                            Sometimes AB's make honest mistakes, and court buildings are often old and have not been rebuilt in years, so as long as I can get in there and function, it OK. Sometimes what people say is kinda funny, so I try not to take it to heart. Since the bailif apologied, and quickly moved on, he probably was embarrassed. The microphone at the witness stand should have eithrt been moved to where you could reach it, or anther one hooked up so you could testify so the jurrors could hear you(If it was a jurry trial). Your lawyer should have set this up with the court ahead of time.

                            If the comment that a person says is deliberately mean or is sooooooo offensive, like the comment someone said to me, "I had a friend just die from what you have.", and the person hardly knew me...now THAT is offensive....totally!
                            Disability is not a medical problem with social issues, but rather a social problem with medical issues.
                            Franklin D. Rosevelt

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                            • #15
                              I did laugh it off bc what else can you do. Obviously everything in the world isn't perfect for everyone, but I'm thinking I would have stood the first time he asked me if I could. I have been facing a lot of this lately and that's why I come here to get it off my mind.
                              If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.


                              Sometimes it is easier to widen doors than it is to open minds.

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