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    Friend's passing

    I received a phone call about an hour ago that a friend of mine, fellow quad, injured about 12yrs passed this morning. The preliminary report is that an infection ultimately killed him. Damn sci.

    Very sad. Nice guy. We used to go 4-wheelin together with his ex-wife and friends just last year. About Oct/Nov though of last year she left him and fleeced him pretty good. Graham never recovered emotionally and was very reluctant to let anyone come around. He shut down and eventually lost his house in the divorce and ended up in a nursing home these last few months. Two weeks ago he checked in to the hospital and unfortunately checked out with a toe tag.

    I always suspected that Graham wasn't a happy guy at his core because of his sci and all of its complications but he did always manage a smile and a kind word. He never let anyone truly know his emotional pain. I really think, and I'm sorry to say this, that he didn't want to live and that he, in a way, welcomed death as a way out of his sci hell.

    He was about my age, 44, smart, good loking, productive. Wonderful parents, couple of brothers. I'm sure they're heartbroken but in a way understood his pain. I hope that his funeral is a celebration of his life.

    Please, all, take care of yourselves and try to love and support your fellow sci brothers and sisters day in and day out. Because you never know, given the visciousness of the injury, how much damage has truly been done until you lose someone that you knew as a part of your life.

    Sleep well Graham, you will be missed.

    #2
    I'm sorry, Chris, truly sorry.
    Blog:
    Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

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      #3
      Chris~
      Sage advice, often the deepest wounds are invisible. I am sorry for the loss of your friend.
      Best~
      B
      Every day I wake up is a good one

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        #4
        Sorry about your friend.It's sad to see some one pass.Best wishes.
        Be yourself!!!
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          #5
          Hi Chris
          Sorry to read.
          Stay strong. What level was your friend?

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            #6
            Sorry to hear. Losing a friend is terrible. My condolences to you and his family.

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              #7
              Liz - C4-5.

              Thx for the kind words everyone.

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                #8
                ugh, tough to hear. SCI can be cruel. sorry for your loss Chris.

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                  #9
                  So sorry Chris I will pray for your friend and his family and friends
                  Be always determined in Life and Love

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                    #10
                    Chris--these are the toughest losses. The depths of non-physical pain brought by a spinal cord injury is enormous.

                    Godspeed to Graham--it sounds like he was someone I would have liked to have known.
                    Please submit your photo and story of hope:

                    http://bridges2hope.unite2fightparalysis.org/


                    http://unite2fightparalysis.org/

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                      #11
                      Chris, so sorry for your loss. My deepest condolences.
                      Daniel

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                        #12
                        Chris , I'm very sorry to hear about your mate . Anyone who doesn't understand the need for urgency in SCI research should look at the number of people whose life is greatly shortened by this mongrel injury . Out of the 80 odd SCIs I met in hospital/rehab I know of 7 that are no longer with us . So it would be reasonable to say 10% have died over a 15 year period . All of them were younger them me [47] and half of them were suicides . I find these statistics horrifying . I also think it is abhorrent that details like SCI are not taken in account during divorce settlements .

                        Chris , my sincere condolences to you and Graham's family .
                        Every day I wake up is a good one .

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                          #13
                          Sorry Chris, sounds like he just gave up.

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                            #14
                            Chris - so sorry to hear of the loss of your friend Graham. My condolences to you and his family.
                            "Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today." ~ James Dean
                            http://www.kristi-allen.com

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                              #15
                              My worst nightmare, dying in nursing home like Graham.

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