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Are you more controlling post-SCI?

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    Are you more controlling post-SCI?

    I know I'm a bit of a control freak now, about everything. If something doesn't go the way I'd planned or especially if someone is doing something for me (cooking dinner, putting something together, cleaning) that I'd like to do, I get really upset. I'm sure its because I feel so out of control with regards to my body and other aspects of my life.

    Anyhow, are others more controlling since their injuries?

    "Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow"
    ~ Anon
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    Yes
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    Somewhat
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    Emily, C-8 sensory incomplete mom to a 8 year old and a preschooler. TEN! years post.

    #2
    I'm not totally certain that I wouldn't be this controlling anyway. I was injured as a child and I'm sure most of us remember how we were as kids when/if we didn't get our own way or do things the way we wanted. [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img] I know I get frustrated if things aren't done the way I would prefer them done or if things aren't put in a place that I can access them but I don't think that's unique to just me.

    He is able who thinks he is able. - Buddha
    He is able who thinks he is able. - Buddha

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      #3
      I was a major neat freak before my injury. I still have that tendency, but the reality of being a quad has forced me to be a lot more relaxed about it. Simplifying things helped: I got rid of a lot of knick-knacks, sold off most of my collections, became ruthless about throwing stuff out, and organized my storage areas so that people would have an easier time finding things and putting them away.

      The only thing I haven't eased up on is cleanliness. Whoa unto those who clean my house!

      Now when it comes to my personal care, bathing, grooming and clothes, I'm more of a control freak than ever. I took that "direct your care" mantra in rehab to heart.

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        #4
        I'm not entirely sure if I'd be classified as "controlling"...when what I really want is for people to leave me alone. Yes, I get mad if someone does something for me that I could have done myself, and they did it without even asking me if I wanted help. But I don't view that as me trying to control them...I view that as correcting them, because they've assumed me to be less capable than I am.

        Don't piss me off or I'll run over your toes. [img]/forum/images/smilies/tongue.gif[/img]
        "Legs are overrated. You can still get laid." - Kevin Girardi, "Joan of Arcadia"

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          #5
          More controlling but mellowing after 13 years.
          Andrew [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img]

          Welcome to the party pal!
          Bruce Willis, Diehard
          So there we were, Two against ten thousand.
          **** we killed those two!!

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            #6
            in personal care i am, im like squeakywheel in that respect .... image is everything. i hate people moving stuff on my desk, its my mess but its an organised mess.

            so yeah to your question emi, i suppose i am somewhat.

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              #7
              My vote is "unsure", I was injured at age 3, but most three-yeaar-olds can be rather demanding.

              Live life as you see fit, not as the world says.
              C2/3 quad since February 20, 1985.

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                #8
                It may not simply be a matter of control; especially people with PCAs know that NOT being in complete control over things like personal care could result in some serious medical consequences.

                "The only true currency in this bankrupt world...is what you share with someone else when you're uncool." - Almost Famous
                "The only true currency in this bankrupt world...is what you share with someone else when you're uncool." - Almost Famous

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                  #9
                  I couldn't vote because I am not spinal-injured but I think that being controlling or not has little to do with spinal cord injury. I can speak from experience, having come from a family with strong-minded women without spinal cord injury. I think that there must be a "control" gene that gets stronger with age and gets an extra boost from having had children. [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img]. Wise.

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                    #10
                    I am absolutely and completely independant. Should someone wish to do something for me, I'll let them, and not freak out about it.
                    That rarely happens, as there's not much for them to do.

                    http://krstofer.org
                    http://krstofer.org

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                      #11
                      I voted no, cuz Ive always been like a little princess...I gotta have it my way or I get upset, which is terrible! I need to be more flexable and less selfish. Everything always has to be neat, always believed that everything has its place.

                      Even if your body cannot move, you can still think and meditate ~Dalai Lama~

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                        #12
                        `More controlling post? nope.....more vocal about my controlling urges? yep. i've always been the control freak...but quitely. now instead of keeping my opinions about my issues to myself and politely fixing whatever is bugging me when whomever is not looking, i have a common tendency to rudely blurt out what I want to change, and how I want it done. it is almost like post SCI I am less tactfull. I hate it.

                        The heart seems to have its reasons which even reason cannot understand.
                        "The best way to predict the future is to invent it."
                        - Alan Kay

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                          #13
                          From an AB perspective, at first glance it may seem controlling. I think what it is really is having things done as you would if you were able. What I take for granted, how my hair looks for example, you should take for granted. It's how you want it to be. Controlling your environment sure, but don't we all?

                          (Tho I did tell folks when I worked in rehab that I did hair neat, not pretty. I can take direction well, but I'm not creative.)

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                            #14
                            No more no less - I don't think [img]/forum/images/smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

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