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  • Dreams

    Before my injury, I wasn't interested in having children. After my injury, I was told that it wasn't likely to happen... pretty much zero chance. At that time, I didn't really care. Skip ahead 27 years and now that a good number of quads are actually able to do so, things aren't so clear. I think that I would like to be a dad and would be a good dad at that, but given the fact that I'm 46 years old and not even dating, that prospect is as far away as the moon.

    Anyway, in the last couple of weeks, I've had a fairly identical dream, twice. I find a baby lying down in the floor or a crib and I pick it up. I hold it to my chest, put my head down on its head and begin bawling. A huge rush of sadness overwhelms me and I wake up.

    Last night it happened again. I feared that I would forget the dream so I asked Alexa to remind me. I've been off of Valium for a little over 5 weeks now and my dreams have been a bit more lucid. There's no way that I'm going back on Valium but I wish that I could stop these particular dreams.

    Anyhow... life goes on.

  • #2
    Scott, if you really want to have children, you could look into fostering or adoption of an older child (probably not an infant).

    (KLD)
    The SCI-Nurses are advanced practice nurses specializing in SCI/D care. They are available to answer questions, provide education, and make suggestions which you should always discuss with your physician/primary health care provider before implementing. Medical diagnosis is not provided, nor do the SCI-Nurses provide nursing or medical care through their responses on the CareCure forums.

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    • #3
      Right now, I can't even help care for myself. I've been doing bed rest for three years and me having a child would be my mom and stepdad caring for a child.

      I haven't actually been consciously thinking about having kids... just the possibility of it, I guess is playing on my subconscious.

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      • #4
        I've had this one dream many times over the years and it's always the same dream. In the dream I'm in my chair balancing a wheelie on the top step of a ladder, when I look down I really can't see that far because the ladder disappears into darkness and there is nothing else around. The entire dream is me trying to balance on that top step without falling off. I've heard that dreams mean something but what the hell that dream is supposed to mean, I have know idea.

        I do not take any pain meds and the only thing that I do take is vitamins.
        SCI Birthday: April 25, 1993
        T4,5,6 Incomplete
        Chair: TiLite TR3

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        • #5
          I tend to have bizarre dreams that most would describe as nightmares. Rarely ever do they disturb me enough to wake me up. This one does something different though. When I first woke up, I was nearly in tears.

          Your dream reminds me of The Waterdance. Wesley Snipes' character describes a similar dream theme when he and William Forsythe's character are outside at night drinking. I get an idea of what your dream symbolizes (to me), but not knowing your situation, don't want to speculate.
          If you haven't seen it, check out The Waterdance.
          www.imdb.com/title/tt0105789/

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          • #6
            Hi Scott, I'm sorry to hear of your sadness. I wonder if it has to do with you and your "inner child" or your holding the innocent baby you once were and the outcome life brought him. Not sure how to explain it. Was just my first thought reading your post.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Patrick Madsen View Post
              Hi Scott, I'm sorry to hear of your sadness. I wonder if it has to do with you and your "inner child" or your holding the innocent baby you once were and the outcome life brought him. Not sure how to explain it. Was just my first thought reading your post.
              I don't feel the sadness outside of the dream, only during it. Repression, perhaps...?
              I don't think its an inner child thing, if it were, I'd expect different dreams. It probably is a combination of hearing about fellow quads having kids now and the fact that everyone my age and even people young enough to be my kids are getting married and having kids of their own and I'm just laying here watching life pass by.

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              • #8
                Hi Scott, your dream might refer to creative potential - is there something you've been wanting to try? Writing, perhaps?
                MS with cervical and thoracic cord lesions

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Bonnette View Post
                  Hi Scott, your dream might refer to creative potential - is there something you've been wanting to try? Writing, perhaps?
                  I've been writing since high school, painting/drawing since I was a kid and invent whenever necessary, but aside from wanting to finish a poem before Halloween (its a horror poem) I haven't been piqued by any created urges lately... consciously anyway.

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                  • #10
                    I have not remembered a dream since I broke my neck.

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                    • #11
                      Do you take any meds for pain, sleep or depression?

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                      • #12
                        Not remembering dreams is not the same as not dreaming. Dreaming occurs during REM sleep, and if you don't have any REM sleep at all (something that can be caused by medications or too brief of a time of sleeping before awakening) delirium or even acute psychosis can occur within just as little as a week.

                        (KLD)
                        The SCI-Nurses are advanced practice nurses specializing in SCI/D care. They are available to answer questions, provide education, and make suggestions which you should always discuss with your physician/primary health care provider before implementing. Medical diagnosis is not provided, nor do the SCI-Nurses provide nursing or medical care through their responses on the CareCure forums.

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                        • #13
                          Scott, is your father still living? We typically assume that dream figures who look like others represent aspects of ourselves, but the reverse can also be true - sometimes when we dream about ourselves, the dream is referring to a figure in our lives with whom we share(d) a bond, whether through family relationship or personal issues. I'm wondering if your father might have had attitudes or experiences that resonate in your own life at this time...maybe regrets, some kind of sadness or feeling of disappointment? If your father is alive, you might be able to ask him about it; if he's not, the dream might still carry a message about some quality or life experience of his that pertains to your life, as well.

                          As Freud famously said, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. But recurring dreams, especially ones with lingering emotional residuals, tend to mean something more. Just a thought.
                          MS with cervical and thoracic cord lesions

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                          • #14
                            Carl Jung was the father of dream analysis. Interesting concept, widely used by classically trained Jungian psychotherapists, but there is a lot of controversy about this, and many psychologists, neuroscientists, and psychiatrists say it is so much hooey. If you want to entertain yourself with such "analysis" and supposed symbolism, just Goggle "dream analysis" or "dream interpretation" and you will find a lot of sites that supposedly will let you interpret your own dreams.

                            (KLD)
                            The SCI-Nurses are advanced practice nurses specializing in SCI/D care. They are available to answer questions, provide education, and make suggestions which you should always discuss with your physician/primary health care provider before implementing. Medical diagnosis is not provided, nor do the SCI-Nurses provide nursing or medical care through their responses on the CareCure forums.

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                            • #15
                              I dreamed last night that I escaped a serial killer - in my wheelchair! He was morbidly obese though so even match I guess. lol His mother helped me escape??? Two others escaped but one was reclaimed.
                              Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

                              T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

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