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    Fml

    Is there an official rant thread? Well if there is I couldn't find it. Anyways, I hate my life now more than ever. June 17th marked the 7 year anniversary of the day my life turned to shit. I'm now 26 years old and what have I accomplished in life thus far? Nothing! How pathetic. I feel so lost I don't even know what to do. I try so hard to get at least one foot in the door but I can't. Always something fucking blocking my way in. I could go on and on but I'll digress. I just felt the need to let everyone know how I was feeling. Spare me the it gets better bs. One can only stay positive for so long. Ok I'm done now for real. Good night!

    #2
    One thing I've learned recently is that very few people like a crip with a negative outlook or bad attitude. I think our only chance is to act happy in public regardless of how we feel. It isn't fair but it's the only thing that seems to work for me. At 24 years post I thought I had earned the right to act normal but apparently I was wrong. Now I'm a happy camper no matter what!

    Slap the happy on and go get them!

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      #3
      You have mentioned that you have a child and you are in school. You are doing and accomplishing something. None of this is a race. You'll get where you're going.

      Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumble bee doesn't know that, so it goes on flying anyways--Mary Kay Ash

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        #4
        Originally posted by november View Post
        You have mentioned that you have a child and you are in school.

        Exactly. I would have killed for either opportunity.

        26 was the age I started working full time and that was 14yrs ago. Still hope yet!
        Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

        T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

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          #5
          I've only been in school since 2008 , stopping, starting, stopping, starting, completely starting all over again, and now at a stop again. I'd much rather work right now.

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            #6
            Why are people who are paralyzed so hard on themselves? #Rhetorical

            I'm this way too .. I just can't figure out why, lol.
            Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

            T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by SequinScandal View Post
              I've only been in school since 2008 , stopping, starting, stopping, starting, completely starting all over again, and now at a stop again. I'd much rather work right now.
              That's exactly what I did. I now feel more motivation to do something than I've felt throughout my whole injury (8.5 years).

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by lynnifer View Post
                Why are people who are paralyzed so hard on themselves? #Rhetorical

                I'm this way too .. I just can't figure out why, lol.
                I'm afraid of not being successful. I always think about how further I'd be in life if I didn't have a SCI. I feel like I want to do certain things, but I need a little help in doing those things and I don't have it. I envy people who have super supportive and helpful families. I don't care what anyone says having that makes getting back on your feet a lot easier.

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by Buck503 View Post
                  That's exactly what I did. I now feel more motivation to do something than I've felt throughout my whole injury (8.5 years).
                  Ditto, I'm so motivated to do things I just don't know where to start and no one to turn to for help/guidance.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by SequinScandal View Post
                    I'm afraid of not being successful. I always think about how further I'd be in life if I didn't have a SCI. I feel like I want to do certain things, but I need a little help in doing those things and I don't have it. I envy people who have super supportive and helpful families. I don't care what anyone says having that makes getting back on your feet a lot easier.
                    I left home at 18 after being paralyzed at 12. I now have a brother who is actively in my life and I can call for help but I'm so used to not having that ... but I didn't for 20yrs. Actually 25.

                    I've exceeded what I set out for myself and I didn't even graduate college or university.

                    You can do this. We all are afraid - quite normal.
                    Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

                    T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by SequinScandal View Post
                      Ditto, I'm so motivated to do things I just don't know where to start and no one to turn to for help/guidance.
                      Whatever you do, it's extremely important that you're sure you're earning useful education. Lots of people are graduating from school, only to find that there are very few jobs in their field.

                      Health care is going to be in huge demand as people retire and new policies kick in, and some health care careers don't require 4 years of school.

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                        #12
                        Originally posted by lynnifer View Post
                        I left home at 18 after being paralyzed at 12. I now have a brother who is actively in my life and I can call for help but I'm so used to not having that ... but I didn't for 20yrs. Actually 25.

                        I've exceeded what I set out for myself and I didn't even graduate college or university.

                        You can do this. We all are afraid - quite normal.
                        It is harder when you also have a small child.

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                          #13
                          Well ... it's not a battle of who has it worse here. I was trying to encourage you. lol
                          Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

                          T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by lynnifer View Post
                            Well ... it's not a battle of who has it worse here. I was trying to encourage you. lol
                            Oh I know I was just saying lol I'm trying guess that's all I can continue to do

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Anniversaries and birthdays can be tough, reminding us of dreams lost, of what might have been. And you're right, having a supportive and helpful family is a big advantage for those of us who are SCI'd/disabled, and it's something I think those of us who have had that sometimes forget and take for granted when we look at or talk about our own successes. Hopefully you've got or can find super supportive friends where your family is lacking.

                              No platitudes, but you're still young, so you've still got time to find a way to make things better. Hang in there.

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