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    His MOTHER?

    So today Chad had cataract surgery, and the person checking us in asked which arm he wanted his arm band on. Chad said either one, and so the lady looked straight at me and said "Mom? Which arm?".

    MOM?????????????????????????????

    Holy f***. I do not look like I am in my MID f*cking 60s even on my WORST day (I am mid 40s for the record), and I was dressed up today because I have to travel on business this afternoon.

    I am furious.
    Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

    #2
    NO FREAKIN' WAY! People suck! Plain and simple.
    Rollin' since '89. Complete C8

    Comment


      #3
      When my mother was already in her 80s, I more than once had someone ask if we were SISTERS!!! It happens.

      I also made the BIG mistake when seeing one of the physicians I work with out in the community one day with a young woman, and asked him to introduce me to his DAUGHTER. Little did I know it was his (new) second wife! Was my face RED.

      Seriously though, this nurse needs to learn that, YES, people with SCI have spouses...they get married, they have sex, some even have kids (I know, I know, it is not possible without the ability to have sex, blah, blah, blah).

      My realtor, who has a tetraplegic injury, was assumed to be my son by many other realtors and homeowners when we were going around to look at houses several years ago. I finally got him to agree to wear his jacket and name badge to make it a little more clear that HE, not I was the realtor, and that I was the client, not his mother or nurse.

      (KLD)
      The SCI-Nurses are advanced practice nurses specializing in SCI/D care. They are available to answer questions, provide education, and make suggestions which you should always discuss with your physician/primary health care provider before implementing. Medical diagnosis is not provided, nor do the SCI-Nurses provide nursing or medical care through their responses on the CareCure forums.

      Comment


        #4
        "People these days," past days, days in the future, it makes no difference. You're right KLD, it happens.

        Thirty years ago, I was 33, GJ was 37 when he was in rehab. He had to go by ambulance on a gurney to another hospital for a scan. When we checked in at the imaging center, the clerk had information to obtain. She turned to me and asked, "What is your son's name." Lesson I learned...introduce myself first, "I'm Mrs. GJ and my husband GJ is here for a scan." The positive result is that the person I am talking to knows how to address me, pronounce my last name correctly, and understand the relationship between GJ and I.

        I'd rather save my energies for fighting the important battles. You can drive yourself nuts trying to fight the small ones.

        Hope Chad's cataract surgery went well and he'll be seeing well very soon. GJ had both eyes done last year and his sight is great!

        NL (GJ's wife and caregiver)

        Comment


          #5
          more than once i've had to take my lil bros to the dr and i am typically called mom by the new nurse/secretary. or just when i am out in public AND our mom is with us i get complimented on how i am such a great mom to the boys. i just say "yea... maybe one day but for now, i am playing with my SIBLINGS"
          when the 16yr old was born we took him out a few months later to visit family. he was crying in the carseat and i was trying to calm him down. one of the little girls in the neighborhood came up and said "oh he is cute! is that your baby?" i totally freaked but i guess a sign of the times!
          "Smells like death in a bucket of chicken!"
          http://www.elportavoz.com/

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by zillazangel View Post
            So today Chad had cataract surgery, and the person checking us in asked which arm he wanted his arm band on. Chad said either one, and so the lady looked straight at me and said "Mom? Which arm?".

            MOM?????????????????????????????

            Holy f***. I do not look like I am in my MID f*cking 60s even on my WORST day (I am mid 40s for the record), and I was dressed up today because I have to travel on business this afternoon.

            I am furious.
            Maybe chad looked really young that day.

            Comment


              #7
              Been there done that and did NOT respond graciuosly.

              WTF I am sorry this mindles twit got under your skin. I've beenntrying to come uo with a clever tarty response but just get angry

              Ket
              Kindly,

              The Ketamine Kitty

              All the tears, all the pain, all the rage through the night (apolgies to the rewrite) RR

              Next time I die make sure I'm gone,
              don't leave 'em nothing to work on JT

              And I ain't nothin but a dream JM

              Comment


                #8
                Maybe she meant you being a mom? was your kid there? Sometimes people in that way refer to people as mom and dad, could be?
                "Life is about how you
                respond to not only the
                challenges you're dealt but
                the challenges you seek...If
                you have no goals, no
                mountains to climb, your
                soul dies".~Liz Fordred

                Comment


                  #9
                  Never ask a woman if she's pregnant. She may just put weight on in that area.

                  Of course I learned the hard way, shrunk a few inches down into my chair but will never make that mistake again.

                  Bob.
                  "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle." - Philo of Alexandria

                  Comment


                    #10
                    How about when you can't tell if the person is a man or woman?

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by TheRainman View Post
                      How about when you can't tell if the person is a man or woman?
                      you say hi and ask their name and which gender pronouns they prefer
                      "Smells like death in a bucket of chicken!"
                      http://www.elportavoz.com/

                      Comment


                        #12
                        "How do you prefer to be addressed?" goes wrong less often than others I've used.

                        General rule: Always cut any estimate of a woman's age in half. Always double the age of any child. If you have to check ID for a senior discount, fib and say you need to see if they are over 21. You may still stick your foot in it, but most people with a shred of decency will appreciate the gentle humor.
                        Played with bombs- No SCI, Brain Damage enough that I require a chair and a caregiver.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by TheRainman View Post
                          How about when you can't tell if the person is a man or woman?
                          Then ask for your $50 back.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by crypticgimp View Post
                            more than once i've had to take my lil bros to the dr and i am typically called mom by the new nurse/secretary. or just when i am out in public AND our mom is with us i get complimented on how i am such a great mom to the boys. i just say "yea... maybe one day but for now, i am playing with my SIBLINGS"
                            when the 16yr old was born we took him out a few months later to visit family. he was crying in the carseat and i was trying to calm him down. one of the little girls in the neighborhood came up and said "oh he is cute! is that your baby?" i totally freaked but i guess a sign of the times!
                            I always got so angry when people just assumed my age. I was 20 when my daughter was born but always looked 6 or 7 years younger. I never was a makeup person and was a bit of a tomboy.

                            Random people would walk up and say "oh it must be so hard to go to school and take care of a baby". This happened until my 30's. Even now when I tell people I have a 24 year old daughter they assume I was 12 when I had her. A doctor was the latest to assume that and she had my birthdate right in front of her.

                            But I always won a prize at the "guess your age" booth on the Boardwalk at Myrtle Beach. They could never guess it.

                            I think it is a compliment that you get comments on what a great mother you are even if it is a little presumptuous of the commenter. I see so many mothers ignore their kids for cell phones these days and it pisses me off. The kids are screaming for just a little attention and they get ignored.
                            T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

                            My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by crypticgimp View Post
                              more than once i've had to take my lil bros to the dr and i am typically called mom by the new nurse/secretary. or just when i am out in public AND our mom is with us i get complimented on how i am such a great mom to the boys. i just say "yea... maybe one day but for now, i am playing with my SIBLINGS"
                              when the 16yr old was born we took him out a few months later to visit family. he was crying in the carseat and i was trying to calm him down. one of the little girls in the neighborhood came up and said "oh he is cute! is that your baby?" i totally freaked but i guess a sign of the times!
                              I get that too. When my brother and I take our baby nephew out, people always assume he's my son when they tell me that my son (nephew) has super long eyelashes. They also think my brother is my husband. My brother and I always let out a "uhhh no".
                              A dolla makes me holla, honey boo boo! - borrowed from Honey boo boo child

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