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4th anniversary of sons suicide

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  • 4th anniversary of sons suicide

    Today is the 4th anniversary of my middle son Alan suicide he would have been 27 this year, every year as Oct 11 grows closer I think this year it won't hurt as much as last year but it does such s mix of 'what if" why's ánd did I miss the clues! That day we ate breakfast together, made plans for the next day and off to cut firewood with his brother he went, my other son told me they had a great day, delivered the firewood to thier uncle drank a few beers with him & headed for their trailer house Alan sat in his truck & drank more beer then at 2:30 a.m shot himself. The worse day of my life began...

  • #2
    What a crushing memory.

    I am very sorry your son and your family have suffered so.

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    • #3
      Please don't blame yourself.

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      • #4
        What an awful and sad anniversary. Alan was so young.
        My husband lost 2 friends to suicide within 2 years and we were witness to the family's grief and guilt.
        I imagine the day brings more of the "what if and if onlys."
        Where we live the have support groups for family and friends of suicide.
        Is there anything like that that might help you?

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        • #5
          You can what if yourself to death. I'm so very sorry.
          Blog:
          Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

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          • #6
            I'm so very sorry, fromnwmont.
            MS with cervical and thoracic cord lesions

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            • #7
              my heart goes out to you. That is a awfully big wound that can't heal. Some places have families of suicide victims get together, like a support group. Reno ,NV does which meets every month.

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              • #8
                My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry.

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                • #9
                  i am so very sorry. just this last week, a student at my son's old hs killed himself. one in my son's class did, too. i cannot imagine what they are thinking, can only offer condolences.

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                  • #10
                    I sympathize with you it is emotionally a feeling no one sould experience .
                    Very heartfelt .

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                    • #11
                      So sad to hear.

                      I have had personal friends do the same through the years...

                      At one point I asked a neighbor why I could not have known and they gently told me I was not equipped to help.

                      Meaning the things in my friend's mind were bigger and deeper than any advice or help i could have offered because what they felt was deeper than I could go.

                      Please know that having you for a parent was a bright spot in your son's life.

                      God bless...

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                      • #12
                        It makes me so sad to read this, a parent worse nightmare. I am so sorry.
                        TH 12, 43 years post

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                        • #13
                          So very sorry :*(
                          Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

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                          • #14
                            sorry to hear that
                            C-6,complete

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                            • #15
                              I can't even imagine. I'm sorry it happened.
                              Roses are red. Tacos are enjoyable. Don't blame immigrants, because you're unemployable.

                              T-11 Flaccid Paraplegic due to TM July 1985 @ age 12

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