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    #31
    Sorry for your loss Kendell.

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      #32
      I'm so sorry Kendell.

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        #33
        I saw the subject line and my heart clutched, fearing that this was going to be the news. Melissa, I am so very sorry for your loss, and my thoughts are with you during this most difficult of times. I have thought about you and Debbie so often, knowing you each had your own formidable battles to fight, and also knowing that your love, care, and support of one another was that rarest of bonds, made in complete trust and generosity. I never really got to know Debbie except through you, but it was more than enough to know how strong she was to deal with all life handed her, and also to know that you were by her side no matter what fate might throw at you both. I wish I could be there in person to give you a hug, but please know there is the cyber version on it's way to you at this very moment. Again, my profound sympathies.

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          #34
          am so very sorry to hear this. you are both in my thoughts.

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            #35
            Aw crap. Sorry to read this Kendell, my sincerest condolences.
            "a T10, who'd Rather be ridin'; than rollin'"

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              #36
              Sorry she had such a hard time this last year, and may you have peace. She's in no pain now and is running free.

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                #37
                I'm so very sorry for your loss.
                BeeBee

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                  #38
                  Condolences and sorry for your loss of your mate, Melissa. May you find strength and know she is free now. God bless.
                  Last edited by Cherbears; 5 Oct 2010, 1:59 PM.
                  ________________________________________

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                    #39
                    So sorry to hear the sad news, sending sympathies to you.
                    Pam

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                      #40
                      I'm so sorry for your loss!! God bless you.

                      I hope she's soaring too Kendall. Free of pain. (hugs)
                      sigpic

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                        #41
                        Just reading this. I'm so sorry about Debbie's passing. You have my utmost sympathy, Kendell.

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                          #42
                          Oh, honey. RIP Debbie. Melissa, buckle your seat belt, this ride is rough. I'm so sorry, babe, just sooo sorry you've been left. Can't help but feel relieved that Debbie's been set free. And she has, and she is.
                          Blog:
                          Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

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                            #43
                            I'm really touched by all the responses and though I don't have time to answer each one individually, please know I appreciate every sentiment.

                            On a physical level, Debbie was a very tough woman. She made idiots out of a lot of doctors over the years who would predict her imminent death, and surprised the Hospice doctors by leaving to go home not once, or twice, but three times. She lived far longer than she should have for all her body went through. Though I would give everything I own to have had her with me far longer, her life had become such a misery of suffering I loved her enough to want her to let go and be free when it became clear that she could not come back to any kind of real health or have any quality of life again.

                            On an emotional level, it is far better that I am left behind than if it had turned out to be the other way around. Debbie could not have handled that. I'm not exactly sure how to proceed with my life without her, nor if I even want to, but I know she would want me to and so I will try. The full reality of this has not really sunk in yet - I've had too much to work out and I"m doing my best to maintain. Sooner or later, it will and yes, Betheny, I expect the ride to be bumpier than anything I've known in my life.

                            Thank you all again, for the kind words. They are deeply appreciated.
                            Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
                            - Albert Einstein

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                              #44
                              So sorry!

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                                #45
                                My heart skipped a beat when i saw your post, and upon opening it i was immediately reduced to tears as it confirmed my worst fear. SCI robs and steals from all of us, the injured and us, the ab spouses. The love between the two of you is inspiring and was so obviously strong and courageous. I recently experienced a terrible loss to the sci beast and it got the better of me, but ive slowly regained some measure of strength since then. I hope for you the ability to grieve deeply, to be gentle with yourself and to surround yourself with the knowledge that she is free from her injury and pain, and her spirit lives on in you, and all those she touched,forever. Nothing ever takes that away. With my deepest sympathies and lovento you my dear friend ..... Ami
                                Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

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