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how many really think they deserved this injury or benefitted by it?

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    Originally posted by orangejello
    If life as a para is unendurable or not worthwhile, why not just end it?

    Not trying to provocate. It's a serious question. I am just curious. Or it can be a rhetorical question. I don't really need an answer. It's something I wonder about for myself sometimes.

    (And before anybody bashes me, I am not encouraging or advocating he go commit suicide)

    My answer to not ending it for myself: most of the time it feels like my life is unendurable. But I still think there are enough worthwhile things in my life/about my life for me to keep going.
    I wasn't speaking for myself entirely. I was just taking up for the underdogs so to speak.

    I live and enjoy things, but I'm still paralyzed in an able-bodied world and that is tough to the psyche sometimes. I hate planning around my shits, urinating in a diaper or leg bag while out, looking at a room I can't paint or completely makeover myself, out of reach things, feeling disposable by people, etc.

    Comment


      Originally posted by Leif
      Still my life was ruined, almost all of it, I can make a long list of things that got ruined in my life and in my body because of this SCI. -So since this life of mine was ruined, I had to make a new life, and so I did. Still the new life wasn’t that good as the first life that got ruined.
      My life was also ruined. I just try not to let that ruin my life. There's a difference. I'm far from fucking happy, I can assure you.
      C5/6 incomplete

      "I assume you all have guns and crack....."

      Comment


        ya know gramps, no one is perfect. least of all me. i called it like i saw it. you 2 were bantering on like children, zinging pointless one liners at each other and anyone who got in the way, in the middle of an otherwise thought provoking thread.

        For the record of the debate, i said you were tiresome, not offensive.

        bravo...you tempted me in to stoop right down there with you. and have even done so again! wow! you should be proud.

        perhaps STFU was out of line, but i contend you are an asshat, none the less.

        cass gave this thread to the community, a great one indeed. interesting to see how it has evolved.

        time to go meditate...i'll send you a column of love.


        Originally posted by Juke_spin
        Ya know kid, a lot of ppl have said a lota things about lots of stuff and ppl in this thread -but only you have had the gaul to call Leif and I pre-pubescent and tell us to STFU. The bad news is that you've shown your ass here while the good is that Cass posted this and has made plain that its rambling and diverse (not to say divisive) development is more than fine with her. And BTW, I'm real partial to the process of debate as well.

        Your sanctimonious little eyes are offended by the dialogue between Leif and I? Put one of both of us on Ignore; leave the thread (I suspect it can struggle on w/o you); apply some of the eastern bs meditation you claim to live by or grit your teeth and live with it.
        "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it." - Edgar Allen Poe

        "If you only know your side of an issue, you know nothing." -John Stuart Mill, On Liberty

        Comment


          nevermind
          Last edited by orangejello; 10 Sep 2008, 8:13 PM.

          Comment


            Originally posted by chick
            What's the point of all the lecturing and arguing over how someone ELSE feels about their injury and situation??

            and, on what imight may feel and believe at the moment, of course some disagree, but is his perspective any less valid or legitimate? Disagreeing, and sharing you're own experiences and evolving thoughts about your own injury (some who've admittedly taken years to get to that place) is one thing, but imposing that onto him (or others) as if anything other than any 'insight' you've gained is ignorant and wrong, is no less ignorant or lacking in perspective, especially when he hasn't been imposing his own feeling/beliefs onto others.

            Considering some of imight's posts since first joining here, I can see some change in perspective and attitude, particularly on relationships, socializing, and travel. I can't say I've seen all posts, but from what I've seen, it's clearly evolved, maybe not to where he might like or find acceptable, but possibly do-able in some respects, and maybe even (dare I say) a little better and easier to deal with than what it was like even a few months ago.

            Some may never find this kind of injury acceptable. Why should they have too? It doesn't mean they don't deal, or even manage to enjoy some things in their lives, or maybe even manage to enjoy their lives.
            Thank you sweetie.

            And btw. I am enduring this. I have already traveled and been to 3 states in the last 3 months, and am going to Brazil and the end of the year. Again, I am doing much more than most people think. I dare not say more than even the people telling me what to do. I know who I am, and I am not this. This is wrong. There is no such thing as a new me, this just isnt me period. I've been convinced to give it more time as I am still new (thus the sn Imight) because for all I know, IMIGHT walk next year unassisted, I was more so referring to the fact that if this IS IT, and this is how life is going to be, I'd rather opt out.

            Don't think I have much to add.

            Comment


              Originally posted by adi chicago
              My opinion ....only gaga[senility]people can be happy because they broke their neck......period.
              No one is happy they broke their neck. I have seen some who are happy in spite of it.

              As far as this improving my life no way. I could have learned the lessons I learned which improved my life from a broken hip with extensive rehab just as well.
              If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.


              Sometimes it is easier to widen doors than it is to open minds.

              Comment


                Originally posted by Leif
                Chris,

                Given you are born in -74, I honestly neither think you know how the 60s or even the 70s was, for that matter.

                And my post above addressed to Juke can be twisted for sure, if one wants to do that, but my point is to clarify; one of the reasons there are no cures for spinal cord injuries today is the lack of involvement for finding cures by the SCI grout at large. -I think you will agree on that.

                And no, I am not blaming my paralysis on nobody, have never done so, and will never do so.

                I am just saying that the spinal cord injury society must be one of the most divided groups here on earth, with the majority not interested in working for cures. But if more work had been put into it, in the past and at the present, one would have been further with therapies for spinal cord injuries, which would have been a good thing. -I think you will agree on that as well.

                .
                Leif darling you don't know what it was like to be injured pre-christopher reeve era. No one cared about such a relatively small community with no connections and no real promising research. I hooked up with the American paralysis association before it moved from SF, but it was the only game in town. When sci ever got any mention in the news it was Gloria Estefan saying she overcame paralysis by 'will power', or it was some movie of the week about some quad killing themselves. Or that chick who found jesus.

                You're not off the mark completely tho, far too few members participate in the advocacy forum. The Reeve bill has gotten farther than it ever has and if members would take 5-10 minutes to call or write their Senators asking them to co-sponsor it we might be able to lift the hold on it. Such an easy task but many aren't doing it! Please people we have only a few months to do this.
                Last edited by leschinsky; 11 Sep 2008, 7:32 PM. Reason: spelling duh!
                Embrace uncertainty. Hard problems rarely have easy solutions. Jonah Lehrer

                Comment


                  I think some of you really need to get a life, I have been disabled for most of my life, I can honestly say that things were not easy for me, but for those who complain that things are hard for them now, try in the 70's when there was no disability act and when your young and they want to put you in a special needs class because they think that you being in a chair makes you a special needs case, try having no curve cuts and no bicycles available to ride, certainly things are hard for us disabled individuals but surely we have come along way in improving alot of things and the world to adjust to us as oppose to adjusting to it. Those individuals who are harping on their injuries I would encourage you to get involved in some type of recreational sports of some kind or get out and see people that are not letting life and their situations beat them up but making the most of the bad lemons that for some strange reason was dealt to them. it really does no good to complain because it never changes anything it just makes you feels worst, but if your looking for change, it has to start with you first.

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by ballhog66
                    I think some of you really need to get a life, I have been disabled for most of my life, I can honestly say that things were not easy for me, but for those who complain that things are hard for them now, try in the 70's when there was no disability act and when your young and they want to put you in a special needs class because they think that you being in a chair makes you a special needs case, try having no curve cuts and no bicycles available to ride, certainly things are hard for us disabled individuals but surely we have come along way in improving alot of things and the world to adjust to us as oppose to adjusting to it. Those individuals who are harping on their injuries I would encourage you to get involved in some type of recreational sports of some kind or get out and see people that are not letting life and their situations beat them up but making the most of the bad lemons that for some strange reason was dealt to them. it really does no good to complain because it never changes anything it just makes you feels worst, but if your looking for change, it has to start with you first.

                    Not all of the CC members are living in the US and we still live in the 70's when it come to being disable. Very little have changed, we have some curbcuts if we are lucky and very few of us are ever getting a job, in spite of education. And sports for disable people are for the young and fit. Not for oldies like me
                    TH 12, 43 years post

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by ballhog66
                      I think some of you really need to get a life, I have been disabled for most of my life, I can honestly say that things were not easy for me, but for those who complain that things are hard for them now, try in the 70's when there was no disability act and when your young and they want to put you in a special needs class because they think that you being in a chair makes you a special needs case, try having no curve cuts and no bicycles available to ride, certainly things are hard for us disabled individuals but surely we have come along way in improving alot of things and the world to adjust to us as oppose to adjusting to it. Those individuals who are harping on their injuries I would encourage you to get involved in some type of recreational sports of some kind or get out and see people that are not letting life and their situations beat them up but making the most of the bad lemons that for some strange reason was dealt to them. it really does no good to complain because it never changes anything it just makes you feels worst, but if your looking for change, it has to start with you first.
                      Hi and welcome newbie; been lurking long? Lemons + sweet + H2O = lemonade; "bad lemons" = compost? Strange way to introduce yourself.
                      "The world will not perish for want of wonders but for want of wonder."
                      J.B.S.Haldane

                      Comment




                        a bold first statement. and a profound one, too boot. i love hearing from the old school SCI folks.

                        I was thinking at dinner about what it would be like to be on bed rest for months due to an injury. or 10 years from now if my wife packs up and leaves because she doesn't want to deal with it anymore. or the first time one of my kids acts embarrased of me in public. or 25 years goes by and nothing changes for the better...or worse, the opposite - it gets much much worse.

                        I could not even get my head around these things...which tells me i have a long way to go, and that i've got it really easy right now, and for that, i should kiss my fucked up legs up one side and down the other.

                        All of the things I mentioned have happened to people here...many of whom have responded to this thread.

                        Just because it's "easy" to deal with for me right now certainly doesn't mean it is, or should be, easy for anyone else.

                        i've seen my share of BS these past few years. i'm sitting here typing with an antibiotic resistant UTI, which can kill me pretty quick. while this is humbling, it's not depressing.

                        These injuries are like snowflakes...every bit as unique as the people who live with them.

                        i do really love hearing from the 'old guard', like Zeus and Ballhog66 and Leschinksy (and so many others) - folks who have managed to keep their heads despite challenges that i can't yet comprehend, over spans of time i've barely lived my whole life.

                        it is an amazing testament to the resilience of the human spirit!







                        Originally posted by ballhog66
                        I think some of you really need to get a life, I have been disabled for most of my life, I can honestly say that things were not easy for me, but for those who complain that things are hard for them now, try in the 70's when there was no disability act and when your young and they want to put you in a special needs class because they think that you being in a chair makes you a special needs case, try having no curve cuts and no bicycles available to ride, certainly things are hard for us disabled individuals but surely we have come along way in improving alot of things and the world to adjust to us as oppose to adjusting to it. Those individuals who are harping on their injuries I would encourage you to get involved in some type of recreational sports of some kind or get out and see people that are not letting life and their situations beat them up but making the most of the bad lemons that for some strange reason was dealt to them. it really does no good to complain because it never changes anything it just makes you feels worst, but if your looking for change, it has to start with you first.
                        "I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it." - Edgar Allen Poe

                        "If you only know your side of an issue, you know nothing." -John Stuart Mill, On Liberty

                        Comment


                          Originally posted by ballhog66
                          I think some of you really need to get a life, I have been disabled for most of my life, I can honestly say that things were not easy for me, but for those who complain that things are hard for them now, try in the 70's when there was no disability act and when your young and they want to put you in a special needs class because they think that you being in a chair makes you a special needs case, try having no curve cuts and no bicycles available to ride, certainly things are hard for us disabled individuals but surely we have come along way in improving alot of things and the world to adjust to us as oppose to adjusting to it. Those individuals who are harping on their injuries I would encourage you to get involved in some type of recreational sports of some kind or get out and see people that are not letting life and their situations beat them up but making the most of the bad lemons that for some strange reason was dealt to them. it really does no good to complain because it never changes anything it just makes you feels worst, but if your looking for change, it has to start with you first.
                          I'd like to know who's complaining and who doesn't go out and socialize?

                          Comment


                            I guess this would be the "new me" singing over the late great "old me", represented poetically by my boy Blue....



                            ...then we buried him and moved on, think about him all the time lol.

                            As much as anything, this has been a truly humbling experience. I'm just lucky to have the support system I do and people in my life that still need me to be around and vice versa.

                            Comment


                              Originally posted by Imight

                              The worst is when people compare each others injuries, one of the weirdest most bizarre things I get from this community.
                              replace injuries with life and hardship.

                              Comment


                                i put it ruined my life, b/c it has, 100%. i was on my way to work, hit an icy bridge. i don't think i deserved this. i didn't steal, do drugs, drink too much, nothing. sometimes i think this is payback for all the good i had in my life before the accident.... had a great herd of horses, had awesome dogs i was breeding, full time job-just got a promotion, finally bought my acreage...i wasn't overweight- just hard working and goal orientated. b/c i achieved as much as i did, i think this is payback for my good luck. i've never stopped believing in God, but he sure pisses me off. i wonder why he picked me? what in the hell did i do? why does he get all the credit when things go good..."God has blessed you, praise him" but when things go bad..its just called bad luck. thats not really fair. my life sucks, giving up everything i've worked for sucks, being alone sucks. all the time i think, 'when will this nightmare end?' i hope i wake up tomorrow, and everything is normal. i've also recently lost my grandparents to cancer. best people on the earth. just good farmers. i've come down with type 1 diabetes. all the things i've worked for, my goals, are gone...out the frickin window.

                                and i don't care if someone rags on me for bitching. you asked, and i'm telling you how i feel. i don't go around all day complaining, or whining....but if someone wants to know the truth on how i feel, i'm not going to sugar coat it. this is the truth, and i'll live with it.
                                ___________
                                T12-L1 since 11-27-06

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