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Meeting w/mom set for Wednesday, AHHHH

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    #16
    Becky

    It's great that you've taken such a rational approach to communicating.

    Just remember that you deal admirably with this shit every day, that makes you incredibly strong. What you've achieved so far is great so don't let that be taken away from you by misunderstanding.

    Enter and leave that meeting with your head up.

    Paul
    C5/6 incomplete

    "I assume you all have guns and crack....."

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      #17
      Becky,

      Best of everything to you tomorrow and in the future! Be proud of who you are, and be proud of who you will be...

      Take care and God bless!

      Teena

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        #18
        Go for it Becky! I like the list idea. I'm glad you are working at settling this. I know it is a big step for you. I hope your mom can accept that she is asking something from you that isn;t an option.
        T7-8 since Feb 2005

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          #19
          Don't be scared. Be strong and 'stand up' for yourself. Good luck!!!!!
          If there is light
          it will find
          you

          --Charles Bukowski

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            #20
            Well, the "ordeal" went as smoothly as it could go. We got there a little early and found out that my doc was running behind which made me super nervous since the therapist was supposed to have a patient at 11 so I thought that she wasn't going to be able to attend. It turned out that we got called back at a quarter to 11 so we had fifteen minutes to talk about the whole trial with the KAFO's before she had to leave. The next almost hour and a half was spent with my doc, my mom and myself. All I can say is that I feel so thankful for my doctor. He was able to put everything in a way that my mom didn't feel like she was being be-littled, which would have made it even harder then it was. He was able to make my mom be quiet long enough for me to say what I needed to say. Usually that is a big problem. I will have something that I need to say and she, my mom, just keeps talking like I am not even in mid sentence. I just have to thank everyone for their support and investment the last few months with everything. I know I have been annoying. I know that there is still a long way to go but I think if I ever need to schedule something like this again, my doc will have no problem with it. And more importantely, I won't feel stupid asking for one.

            Becky,
            Chicago
            T8-9 according to latest scoring.......
            since 1/3/04

            I am the best at being me. No matter how that happens to be!!

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              #21
              Yay Becky! It sounds like a very good first talk. You haven't been annoying, by the way. Geeze, if you can't talk about this stuff here where can you? I am glad the doc had the ability to silence your mom long enough that she could hear right from the horses mouth what some of the issues are. I hope you are feeling proud of yourself today, because you should be. GOOD JOB!!

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                #22
                You're not annoying! We just get frustrated trying to help you see what is painfully obvious, i.e. you can't keep trying to please someone who is not dealing with all the facts. I hope that now she is in possession of those facts, she will encourage you to live the best possible life even if it is from a seated position. Keep us posted!
                Blog:
                Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

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                  #23
                  I really hope this worked so you can finally get on w/ your life Becky. You definately haven't been annoying, this is your haven to vent and gain support. Please keep us posted, we'll be here.

                  If all else fails though, atleast you'll have Candy..

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                    #24
                    I think we've all dealt with irrational (the you can walk if you really try types) family members or aquitances at one time or another

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                      #25
                      Yay, becky! I'm so relieved to hear that it was a positive experience for you and your mother.
                      Daniel

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                        #26
                        Becky

                        I just have a little advice to offer. Like Betheny said, you cannot keep trying to please someone else. Please dont live your life trying to. I can tell you from an "old woman's" life experience, it makes for a miserable life and you never feel good enough even after mom is long gone.
                        T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

                        My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

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                          #27
                          Betheny and Darkeyed daisy, I know that I can't please everyone all of the time. However, there a few select few that I try to please as often as possible. These people being my parents. I know you may think that is stupid but it was how I was raised. Also, I want as badly, as my mom, to be able to one day walk again and I think that we are just both on different tracks. Kind of like two trains heading for a head on collision, or atleast we were, hence the need for the meeting. Thank you for the advice. I try to remember it daily otherwise I would be worse off then I am already.

                          Becky,
                          Chicago
                          T8-9 according to latest scoring.......
                          since 1/3/04

                          I am the best at being me. No matter how that happens to be!!

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                            #28
                            Originally posted by bcsimpsons
                            Betheny and Darkeyed daisy, I know that I can't please everyone all of the time. However, there a few select few that I try to please as often as possible. These people being my parents. I know you may think that is stupid but it was how I was raised. Also, I want as badly, as my mom, to be able to one day walk again and I think that we are just both on different tracks. Kind of like two trains heading for a head on collision, or atleast we were, hence the need for the meeting. Thank you for the advice. I try to remember it daily otherwise I would be worse off then I am already.

                            Becky,
                            Chicago
                            Becky I was raised that way too and unfortunately no matter what I did, it was never good enough. I know you want to please your parents but sometimes parents place heavy burdens on their children without even realizing the damage it is doing to them. Just because you (or your mom) want to walk again does not mean that it is going to happen.
                            T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

                            My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

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                              #29
                              Yep. Trying is great, and I hope you never stop. It's just a piece of the puzzle, though. The Puzzle Of Life has many pieces. Walking and pleasing parents are only 2...probably not the most important ones. I think it's good you want to please her. Just keep it in perspective.
                              Blog:
                              Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Becky,
                                I'm glad your meeting went so well. Trying to please others is ok, but if your not pleased with yourself, the ones that really matter to you won't be either.
                                Stupidity ain't illegal, but it sure is inconvenient.


                                Help me support the 2010 Bike MS.

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