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    #31
    I most definately wanted kids, ever since being a kid. No second thought was ever given to carrying on the irish catholic tradition of having a big family. Being the eldest and having 20+ younger cousins, babysitting provided a full time job and I absolutely loved every minute of it.
    Originally posted by jayday9
    I have been around kids my entire life and absolutely love 'em....It was the weirdest thing, I could be in a restaurant and have a kid I've never met before poke his head over the booth and grin...It was always just so genuinely heartwarming to have those interactions with little kids.....
    Reading that I couldn't help but get a big smile, it reminding me of the same thing that happened just last week. An adorable young boy popping his head over the booth and giggling as I made silly faces getting the same enjoyment out of seeing his reactions. HOWEVER, accompanying these moments of joy with children I can't help but feel some of my heart break too. I think with my SCI I not only lost the movement of my legs and hands but lost the dreams of having children too.
    In choosing to become a mother you carry two responsibilities.....to love that child unconditionally and to provide the best possible care for him or her. Although we live in a world of wonderful medical advancements childbirth still carries heavy risks. Lets say perhaps that child, God forbid, was born having some sort of defect.....although I do not question my ability to love that child to the fullest, being a c-6 quad I could never give the adequete care that may be required. To run this possibilty is something I never think I'll be able to do.
    Don't wish for it, work for it.

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      #32
      My son was born 10 days after I turned 20. I love him, but the situation at the time was not good. He would love to have siblings and constantly held on to his favorite toys and outgrown clothes "for his baby brother." He's held onto this stuff for the last 12 years. He finally understands why there won't be one, and saved his favorite stuff for the memory box. Last summer he was able to let go of all those clothes and we donated them to the Veterans Food Pantry. I would love to have another child. I wish I could have another one. I love having kids and actually enjoyed being pregnant. It's not in the cards though.
      http://official-linerider.com/index.html

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        #33
        Moody, I was wondering when we were going to get new baby pics. How cute!
        www.cawvsports.org
        The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same. ~ Don Juan Matus
        We are Virginia Tech… We must laugh again… No one deserves a tragedy… We are strong, and brave, and innocent, and unafraid…We are better than we think and not quit what we want to be…We are the Hokies…We will prevail, we will prevail, we will prevail. We ARE Virginia Tech! ~ Nikki Giovanni

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          #34
          Why would anyone have kids?

          Because this guy has made me smile for the last 19 years...

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            #35
            I have no children, and the jury's out on whether I ever will, but I do have many friends with disabilities (SCI, CP, MD) who have kids. Let me tell you this--

            Want more people in this world who are accepting, truly accepting, of disability, difference, adversity, struggle, etc? Then have a child. Ok, so it's definitely not the only reason to have kids, but the kids of my crip friends are the best kids I've ever met. Hands down. They just get it from the youngest ages. Disability is natural to them, just like it should be for everyone.
            Disclaimer: I use voice dictation software, due to chronic tendinitis. Any gibberish-type errors in this post are due to the software's stupidity, not my own. Protect your arms and hands from overuse, people!

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              #36
              i always wanted kids and i still do when the time is right.

              i'm not physically capable of bearing a child just now (without health concerns with being a quad) and i still have school and everything else before i even think of kids.

              plus, i got growin up to do still.
              Never take life seriously, nobody gets out alive anyway

              Frank's blog:
              http://www.franktalk-scurry.blogspot.com
              My regular blog:
              http://www.ithinkithinktoomuchblog.blogspot.com

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                #37
                Why do I want Kids? After many years pondering, I finally realized, I can teach my child how to be better than me. I would love to have a child. Boy or Girl, it doesn't matter. I spent many years pursuing my biochemistry degree and I finally realized, I can give a child knowledge. Knowledge which will help in todays: environment, economy, world view and hopefully a better world to live in. A smile in the eye's of a child. All I can say is WOW!! Hope I will have the opportunity to succeed in having the challenge of being a proud parent. Needless to say, my wife and I are trying to have this kind of blessing.
                Sometimes the lights all shinin on me; Other times I can barely see. Lately it occurs to me what a long, strange trip its been: The Grateful Dead

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                  #38
                  Originally posted by Moody


                  Parenting is one of the greatest joys in life. I hope people wont let SCI stand in the way if they want a child. My husband is a wonderful father. He amazes me in every way. He figures out how to do things I could never come up with if the shoe was on the other foot. And our son ADORES him.

                  This is the cutest baby I have seen in a long time!! Look how happy and healthy he is and just look at those cheeks!! I want to babysit. Such cuteness!!! Good Job Moody, life is different now eh?

                  Mary
                  1FineSpineRN

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                    #39
                    I used to ask myself this question all the time before I had my son. Honestly there isn’t a logical answer to why people want to have kids (AB or not); it seems more logical not to have any children now days, but having the unconditional love of someone that looks at you like you are some type of hero, that admire you and accept you just the way you are is priceless. I would not change my life as a mother for anything. I may not be the best mom, but it is worth trying.
                    Last edited by Wheelchair_Diva; 10 Mar 2006, 2:39 PM.
                    "Your unhappiness is a result of your attitude, which you can change.You can continue to brood over what went wrong, or you can turn around and contemplate what can go right in the future. You don’t have to be miserable unless you enjoy misery."

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                      #40
                      I got a lil teary-eyed looking at your boy grow up, Davey Thanks for sharing....

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                        #41
                        Originally posted by KiranA
                        I got a lil teary-eyed looking at your boy grow up, Davey Thanks for sharing....

                        I did too!! What an awesome response!!!
                        Shannon
                        C6/7 incomplete
                        20 yrs post sci

                        "falling is easy it's getting back up that becomes the problem, becomes the problem" Staind
                        "A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of.:" :-)
                        - Burt Bacharach

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                          #42
                          stuck in the middle

                          Having kids has been something I've been thinking abot lately. I feel like I'm on the late bus because I'm 27 yrs old and majority of my peers have wives/families. I'm stuck because I want kids, but then again I don't. Atleast no time soon. My day is so consumed with just doing daily living tasks and classes I don't feel I have the time for children.

                          When I was 18 my girlfriend got pregnant, but had a abortion. I often wonder what my life would be like now if I had those kids today. I feel like it would be harder for me to deal with my injury. So when I look at my bro and sis w/ their kids I'm almost glad not not be a parent at this point(which kinda makes me feel bad for feeling this way). I truly think I wouldnt be able to handel it. I'm exhausted just taking care of me, and thats including the help I get from my family.

                          I love my neices 2 death, but when they've stayed at my house for a wekend, I'm calling their parents to come and get them..OMG- (2) 3yr olds and a 5 yr old is not a good idea to have all at one time(lol) I love them, though. but what I love even more is that they can go home to their parents..(lol)

                          To all who are parents w/ SCI- God Bless You. to me thats a person w/ extreme strength.
                          "People Will Forget What You've Said, They'll Forget What You've did, but They'll Never Forget How You Made Them Feel" -Maya Angelou

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                            #43
                            Originally posted by KiranA
                            I got a lil teary-eyed looking at your boy grow up, Davey Thanks for sharing....
                            Originally posted by 30something
                            I did too!! What an awesome response!!!
                            Thanks guys. I've watched my son grow up over the years and now I'm getting a little teary-eyed as he moves out and goes to college . I never knew how much I'd really miss him (and how much he made me laugh every day) until he actually moved out.

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                              #44
                              Davey, I know what you mean. Starting at age 2, my son would go stay with my folks for a month. Starting at age 7, he started flying by himself to WV to see his biological father. So, one month with my folks in CA, then one month in WV, with a week here inbetween. Usually, i get about 2 weeks of summer with him.

                              This year, he will be gone as soon as school is out, if not before and will return three days before school starts. Gah. It's so quiet around here when he's gone and that's not always a good thing.
                              http://official-linerider.com/index.html

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                                #45
                                Originally posted by ROYALTY79
                                I love my neices 2 death, but when they've stayed at my house for a wekend, I'm calling their parents to come and get them..OMG- (2) 3yr olds and a 5 yr old is not a good idea to have all at one time(lol) I love them, though. but what I love even more is that they can go home to their parents..(lol)

                                To all who are parents w/ SCI- God Bless You. to me thats a person w/ extreme strength.
                                I love little kids too. They're so much fun to be around and talk to. And damn, they have so much energy. It's amazing how they can run around for so long and play. It tires me out a bit just watching them run all over the place. I wish I were a kid again!

                                But they're my nephews and my neighbor's kids and after awhile it's a relief to see them leave. The old saying about relatives (and their kids) staying at your house is like fish. After a couple/few days things begin to stink!

                                Or like having a boat. The two best days are the day you first buy it and then the last, when you finally sell it!

                                I'm with you Royalty.

                                PS. I paid for a couple abortions too when I was in my late teens/early 20s and it was probably for the best as I was paralyzed when I was 24. But you still think about "what coulda been". Geez, they'd be in their 30s now. Hmmmmm?
                                "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle." - Philo of Alexandria

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