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Advise need

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  • Advise need

    Let me start out by saying I'm not sure if this is the correct location if not please move.

    My father is 2 years post. C6/C7 complete 52 years old. Pressure sores from when he was hospitalized at time of injury. Also my father has MSRA. My mother (55) has been his full time caregiver. doing it all working full time.

    I live 2.5 hours away and have a 2 year old son.

    My mother has been just diagnosed with stage 3 lung cancer. Will begin a round of chemo and radiation 5 day a week. In 10 day's.

    I have a few conserns for both there health. I know my mother should not be around small children or pregnet people. I am wondering if there any restrictions being around my father? Would there be any ristriction for my father being around my mother.

    I have informed her to check with her doctor on these thing but she does not go back for a few day's and we found out the stage and course of action today..

    So I'm just looking for some advise and some piece of mind.

    Thank you advance for you assitance.

  • #2
    Hi Tab ..... I'm so sorry your family is having to deal with all this!
    I can't be sure but I wouldn't think it would be wise for your Mom to be caring for your Dad given her own health issues especially once her treatments start .... maybe one of the sci nurses can offer some advice. It does sound to me like you're going to need to get some outside help for them though ..... do what you can yourself and don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it!
    I wish you and your family all the best.

    ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi

    " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
    Jane Siberry


    • #3
      First, I have concerns about your mother being immunosupressed during her cancer treatment, which could make her vulnerable to getting a serious infection from your father's MRSA colonization. This can be minimized but not eliminated by very strict hand washing, using gloves for all oral care, bowel and bladder care and wound care, and keeping all equipment and surfaces well disinfected (bleach solution wipes are best).

      Secondly, I doubt very much if your mother will have the energy to do this. She will be lucky to be able to manage her own care. Both chemo and radiation sap your strength, and she will be vulnerable to fevers, periods of vomiting and/or diarrhea, and need someone to care for her.

      Your choices would include:

      1. Arrange for your husband and a baby sitter to care for your son. Go to your parents home, learn your father's care and also assist your mother through her crisis. Get professional assistance (temporary home care nurse) to help you learn necessary skills if needed, even if you have to private pay (Medicare will often cover a few RN visits for family teaching).

      2. Take both parents into your home and get assistance for your father's care so you can help your mother with her health needs. You may have to private pay for your father's care through an agency. Your son is at low risk of acquiring MRSA unless he is touching his dressings, stool or mucous membranes. Regardless of his age, he should be taught to wash or clean his hands, and objects that come in contact with your father should be disinfected for everyone's protection.

      3. Place your father in a nursing home and take your mother into your home .

      None of these are easy choices. If you have siblings, they should be helping out too. I would strongly recommend a family pow-wow to look at your options and divide up the responsibilities for your parents needs.

      The SCI-Nurses are advanced practice nurses specializing in SCI/D care. They are available to answer questions, provide education, and make suggestions which you should always discuss with your physician/primary health care provider before implementing. Medical diagnosis is not provided, nor do the SCI-Nurses provide nursing or medical care through their responses on the CareCure forums.


      • #4
        Thank you for your input. All these options have come up. I have offered to take my mother in but she want's to contintue her treatment where she is in her home town. I have discussed the seriousness with my father of needed to get help in. And he has friends that are learning for his care. Along with a number of people (nurse) my mother worked with comming in. I was mainly concnered with MRSA cause I fear with everything that is going on this is something she would forget to mention to the doctors.
        Thanks again.


        • #5
          Hi Tab:

          I don't have anything to share but I just wanted to say that our prayers are with you and your family.



          • #6

            Thank you.