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Spouse is tired of dealing with disability, but still loves me

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    #91
    I wondered the same thing DD....
    Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager

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      #92
      A relationship & marriage after SCI is challenging...especially for the partner/spouse who isn't in the wheelchair. After my injury I've dated & have had relationships of a few months but nothing long-term. It's understandable but still frustrating & upsetting that so many women don't react well to my injury...I had one woman say that she "didn't want to be a caregiver". I get down quite a bit thinking I'll never meet someone...let alone get married.

      Hopefully you & your husband stay 2gether...your lives apart would not be as happy & fulfilled as 2gether.
      C4/5 incomplete, 17 years since injury

      "The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same.” - Carlos Castaneda

      "We live not alone but chained to a creature of a different kingdom: our body." - Marcel Proust

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        #93
        yeah, well my left after 42 yrs of marriage, and 5 yrs of disability. In those 5 yrs never received a hug, caress or a thot to helping me rehab. Guess I'm lucky to have her gone. She wants a "trial separation" I'm leaning toward the d word. Seems complete enuf for me>

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          #94
          Caregiver/spouse respite---Has made a difference in our marriage

          http://www.lovelikethislife.com/2012...This+Life)&m=1


          Matt and I learned after several years that it was good for us one another about today's quarter. I just go to a cheap hotel about 10 minutes away. Not because we're fighting but to recharge. You should totally nominate your spouse for this. It will make a difference in your marriage if you start incorporating something like this in. The first time we took a break it was for two weeks and he went and stayed with his mother. I really needed that whole two weeks. And it made a dramatic change to our relationship. But then we waited too long to do it again. And we started fighting and everything became 'the straw the broke camels back' to either one of us. Now we do it more frequently.

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            #95
            No my cousin isn't a member ill tell him to join then hopefully he can get her to join thanks

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              #96
              Originally posted by elizabeth422 View Post
              No my cousin isn't a member ill tell him to join then hopefully he can get her to join thanks
              And don't just create another member like the day dispatch jen was called out and your were "created" the exact same day with startling similarities.
              Hmmmm.
              My husband is back in the hospital and I logged on to touch base with caregiver group.
              Non member "cousins and uncles" can inquire for themselves.

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                #97
                Originally posted by elizabeth422 View Post
                No my cousin isn't a member ill tell him to join then hopefully he can get her to join thanks
                Why are you interested in a caregiver forum for people with spinal cord injuries when you don't have one?

                How do you even know about it to tell him? Are you a member of the caregiver's group?

                Or are you just wanting to troll for information?

                If memory serves me correctly, the caregiver's group is not even accessed by most people here with spinal cord injury as it is their personal place to talk about issues regarding care issues for spouses, significant others, and family etc.

                I asked a question can you answer it?

                What you are asking doesn't even make sense. Just so you know....
                T12-L2; Burst fracture L1: Incomplete walking with AFO's and cane since 1989

                My goal in life is to be as good of a person my dog already thinks I am. ~Author Unknown

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