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Can't Get Used to Having PCA

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    Originally posted by Domosoyo View Post
    She went down a couple levels since August and is now functioning at C6.

    Had a good day yesterday with PCA as we all get more comfortable with this new person in our house. I still think that just because we are approved for ten hours of paid PCA service a day we won't use that much. We're not going to have PCA's in the house ten hours a day just because we have that benefit and my daughter is more and more focused on being more independent which is great. We are all just trying to get used to this and I know I need the break and my daughter needs the break from me too.

    Have you asked your daughter if she prefers having a PCA do her cares instead of you or other family members?

    I ask only because i'm also a C-6 quad and while i was older when getting injured, 21 at the time, i had to move back in with my mom/her husband after leaving the hospital. At first i would have an aide for 3 hours a day Mon-Friday to do stuff like range of motion, bowel program, shower, and get me dressed. On weekends, my mother usually did those cares and if she couldn't, her husband or my sister did them. Well for me at least, family doing my cares was very awkward even though i never told them so. It was especially weird being 21 and naked around my mom and sister. Plus, i have an incomplete injury and there was some hope i might get function back so the doctors kept me off muscle relaxers to keep muscle tone via spasms in case any function came back.

    Since you have a quad daughter instead of a son, you probably don't know that male quads get what's called reflex erections. They arrive randomly and often from simply moving around, not from say dirty thoughts. When i'm not on muscle relaxers as i wasn't back then, these boners happened all the time. One weekend my mom is doing my cares and when transferring into bed after a shower so she could dress me, i could feel Mr. Happy rising to attention under my towel. After she put my socks on, i didn't want to have her take off the towel to put on my underwear and told her we have a problem here, but we were in a hurry to leave for a family gathering. So not only do i have to explain to my mom how this situation got this way, she by pure fluke had grabbed the smallest pair of my underwear in the drawer. My whole body gets crazy stiff when this happens and here my own mother is trying to tuck my hard ass boner into a small pair of underwear as my body is jerking and spasming all over the place. You wanna talk about an epically awkward uncomfortable situation i'll unfortunately never forget. That was the final straw for me and i did some calling to see if i could get a PCA for all seven days a week in the morning.

    Point being that i don't know you daughter, but her being a teen, she likely either feels much more comfortable with a PCA doing her cares, even though they are largely a stranger or she hates that and prefers family which she knows so much better. One of the hard things initially to get used to about being paralyzed as a quad is having your privacy vanish. Instead of showering and dressing yourself, you have family or strangers helping you. It takes time getting used to and for me at least, it was much more awkward having people like my mom and sister help dress and shower me than even new aides that i'd meet for the first time. If i was you, i'd take her opinion on that very strongly, especially with her already being in those awkward teen years.


      Every injury is different, function varies from patient to patient. As a C6, quad I am fully independent: showering, dressing, B&B, etc. I think that your daughter could get there as well without any PCA's. To each his/her own.