No announcement yet.

Whose car should an aide drive to go shopping?

  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    I'm sorry, I said that poorly, though I do always appreciate supportive indignation, as many of my aide experiences have merited. She drives my car frequently with me in it so her using it is not itself a big deal. We just never spoke about whose car she was taking to the store and I was assuming she was using her car unless I was with her, until I realized otherwise. She acts entitled to a lot and gives me a lot of grief about asking her (very amiably) for what I think are very reasonable things -- being on time (she is regularly 15 minutes late, and defiant about it), washing her hands with soap. She is the most reliable about showing up at all (not insignificant when I really struggle to get out of bed by myself) than most of the aides I've had over the last two torturous years that I've needed them for basic managing, and graciously accommodates my less than desirable schedule, so I don't want to make too many waves. I've found a pretty peaceful place where I can enjoy whatever good humor we can share and just let her BS otherwise roll over me. I've gotten good at not wasting energy.

    But it’s actually my parents’ car, on loan since I sold mine and am working on a van. They are coming up for a few weeks over the holidays and will need to use it, and I just want to be prepared when my aide gives me grief when the car is not available and I ask her to go shopping with her own car. And I’m not goimg to let her drive my new van. The store she goes to when she's here in only about half a mile away.

    She lives about half an hour away when traffic is bad, and I need her to come twice a day, so I pay her significantly more than the agency rate to compensate for the driving and gas (as well as give her more hours than I need, so unless she’s cooking (a couple times a week), she just sits and does nothing, sometimes sleeps). She dismisses that and still complains a lot about gas, refuses to register when I do the math for her and show her that the extra I'm paying her is significantly more than her daily transportation costs.

    So anyway, am I concluding that this is supposed to be a contractual thing? I don't recall any mention of it in the contract I signed with the agency, but the other woman who volunteered that driving her car to the store was part of her job works for the same agency. They are not the most professional, so I like to know standard practice before I address such things with them.

    You remind me I also need to think about the insurance aspect. She has her own insurance, which as far as I know is the only legal requirement for being covered driving my car (NJ law I learned with the last aide to crash my car: anyone who drives must be listed on someone’s insurance, whomever’s car she’s driving). Do you think insurance works differently if the person driving your car is an employee?


      From my understanding, the key is whether another person will be regularly driving your car in a planned manner - not just a friend borrowing it while their car is in the shop or something. Since our PCAs drive our car frequently, we just put them on our insurance to be extra sure. This runs the risk of jacking up our insurance if they are in an accident of course, so we are picky about who we insure and allow to drive. We don't have a PCA now, but this is what we do when we have one.
      Wife of Chad (C4/5 since 1988), mom of a great teenager


        Even when my roommate wanted to use my car for a week, I asked my insurance agent and the company wanted an extra buck and change per day for the days he'd be borrowing my car.


          Agency? My MIL has long term care insurance and was letting her extra, post-hospital stay aide drive her care. Big no no for LTC coverage of agency hires. Check and you may be able to blame it on an audit warning..
          Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow."

          Disclaimer: Answers, suggestions, and/or comments do not constitute medical advice expressed or implied and are based solely on my experiences as a SCI patient. Please consult your attending physician for medical advise and treatment. In the event of a medical emergency please call 911.


            It is always discussed before hand what car should be used. If the caregiver is not asking they are not doing their job well. All it could be is that the caregiver is not so good at communication. Dont feel bad about talking to him/her about it. Or talk to the agency about it. Sometimes they write stuff in the files like "client uses their car for errands" see if that needs to be updated on your file.
            I had a client that had me drive his car, I still suggested using mine just in case of any miss-communication. So I try to go over everything with my clients, however annoying it may be to talk about details.....
            Just get it put in the file and you should be ok. Some client files don't get updated as often as they should be.
            The caregiver prob wont think twice about it anyway, its still a job and they still have to follow YOUR instructions! LOL Isnt it great when you run the show? LOL