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    Originally posted by kap
    Its weird, I'm happy to have him back but all of a sudden I feel really crowded. I cant seem to sleep well now. Maybe time for a King size???? I guess I got used to sleeping alone ............
    Kelly
    I hear that Kelly ..... at the same time as I am excited about having our family melded once more .... I fear it ... because we have established this routine that in spite of its weirdness is .... our routine ..... we've gone through this many times after some of Bill's extended hospital stays and while we eventually settle in again it isn't always easy ..... on top of which we will go from a house full of women (3 at the moment .... did I mention Julie moved home for a brief while ) to one with a man in it !

    Ah me ..... what a life ..... it will be odd too because in this house we will have seperate bedrooms .... at least for the time being ... because Bill is on a hospital frame which accomodates his low air loss mattress! I have no idea how long that situation will carry on ... although his pressure sores are nearly completely healed I am almost afraid to go back to a regular bed with him because his skin has responded so well to being on that mattress not to mention the edema in his feet ..... I guess we'll just play it by ear for now !! Once you get used to all that room in a bed all to yourself its .... well ..... you know !

    Gad Kap ..... rollercoasters .... I think the one I'm on will do for now ..... but go ..... have fun fun fun ........all that screaming is a good stress reliever !

    Obie
    ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


    " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
    Jane Siberry

    Comment


      I have this analogy that ppl in a marriage are like 2 pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. You go along, your pieces fit. Something happens, you're apart for a long time, your edges grow. They don't fit anymore. You have to keep squeezing in until they do...sometimes you practically have to chisel the damn things off!

      The worst, for us, was when my husband worked in KS for a yr. Kids and I were in TX. A close 2nd was when he worked in OK for 6 months, kids and I (fresh out of rehab) still in TX.

      Aaarrgghhh. Tight fit. The bed, the remote control, the stupid toothpaste lid, the child-rearing...The human species seems to want to grow their edges, like do things THEIR way.

      Luckily I'm totally malleable. My husband is truly blessed.

      Blog:
      Does This Wheelchair Make My Ass Look Fat?

      Comment


        Originally posted by betheny
        I have this analogy that ppl in a marriage are like 2 pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. You go along, your pieces fit. Something happens, you're apart for a long time, your edges grow. They don't fit anymore. You have to keep squeezing in until they do...sometimes you practically have to chisel the damn things off!
        Damn your funny Beth ..... that's exactly right and your analogy is perfect!
        Bill used to work away from home alot when the kids were small pipelining and driving heavy equipment ...... it feels almost the same except now I'm older and crankier and of course there's that little guilt problem I'm still workin' on !

        I know what I need ..... I need the pipe .... haven't seen that thing around here in ages (I think Deb has been bogarting it ) .... maybe a little Enya to go with ..... {{{{ducks for cover}}}}}}}}

        Obie
        Last edited by Obieone; 10 Jul 2008, 8:18 PM.
        ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


        " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
        Jane Siberry

        Comment


          Wait .... you can't bogart a pipe ...... either way she's got it ... I just know she's got it ... probably sharing it with her new book club friends ... hiding under that rock !

          Obieone
          ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


          " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
          Jane Siberry

          Comment


            love the analogy Betheny! Its so true. Although I think my back end of the puzzle piece has grown the most.

            We did the rollercoasters yesterday and it was a blast. Mya went on her very first "Big" rollercoaster. None of that kid stuff. At first, I was really worried about her. As we climbed the first drop her eyes popping out of her head I was thinking uh oh, this is too soon. Throughout the entire ride her eyes didn't blink once, I swear, and of course the good mom I was, I laughed at her the whole time. But as we got off she asked if we could go again, thats my girl!

            We had a great time and made it through the park in record time. It helped that it was raining off and on, scared away all the non-diehards. Hopefully we'll get to go back for Halloween.

            Have a great weekend all!
            Kelly

            Comment


              Originally posted by betheny

              Luckily I'm totally malleable. My husband is truly blessed.


              And I sincerely hope he knows it.

              Comment


                Egads ..... the renos are complete he's moving back ..... do you detect a note of trepidation ? Ah well we'll chip away at the grooves of those puzzle pieces and make 'em fit yet again ...... I know Bill is excited ... it's his birthday this Sat. too so we'll have a real celebration. Managing two households has been exhausting and having his Mom so involved in our private lives has been difficult so I'll be glad to get back to our oddball way of life and not having to explain to anyone why or how we do something. Privacy is a precious thing !

                And since I'm doing an update I'll mention my eldest daughter is once again registered in University ..... I'm happy for her she's made a decision and happy to have my house back ( both from the carpentars and her unmentionables ) ... although its been a little cramped her younger sis has enjoyed having her home allowing her to do some grown up sorts of things and it freed me up to tend to everything that's being going on around here.

                Life sure is funny .... not ..... one minute everything feels like it's upside down and the next the pieces seem to just fall into place ..... I think I'll just savour the moment .. ..cause as we all know the sh*t can hit the fan when we least expect it!

                Obieone
                Last edited by Obieone; 23 Jul 2008, 10:23 AM.
                ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                Jane Siberry

                Comment


                  Yeah, obi I'm so happy for you. Happy that Bill is moving out of mom's house and back with you and happy that you survived the renos. Sometimes just trying to live with workers invading your home is the hardest part. We have so many things in our house that need to get done but I keep overlooking them b/c I hate having my house torn apart and workers disrupting my schedule. (I'm a little bit of a control freak over my house ) Its just not fun.

                  Hopefully, now you all can enjoy the last part of summer in peace and comfort of the newly renoed home! Enjoy!

                  Kelly

                  Comment


                    Tsk Tsk, the way you ladies talk about us behind our wheelchair backs.I am actually Mr mom here, was for 12 yrs b4 my surgery gone wrong. I was on disability due to yrs of lupus, and did it all-ceptn' windows, hate windows. My wifes co workers are all jealous, she has dinner ready when she gets home. I even fixed dinner first full day outta rehab. So it works both ways sometimes.

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by fishin'guy
                      My wifes co workers are all jealous, she has dinner ready when she gets home. I even fixed dinner first full day outta rehab. So it works both ways sometimes.
                      That is very true ... it does.....Bill makes the best meatballs on the planet and his ribs on the barbecue ... yummy ..... well ... not HIS actual ribs ..... its in his secret sauce !!

                      Bill and I will be married 31 years this fall ..... it'll be nice to have him back to finish my sentences again ! Our animals will be happy too .... Shady our dog is a rotti/shepherd cross pound puppy we rescued about 6 years ago and Bill has her almost trained as a service dog ..... if he could just figure out how to get that nose of hers under control .... when she goes with him on his scooter ... if she gets sniffing something .. she's out of control until she's sniffed out!!

                      I was wondering .... do any of you old timer CC caregivers ever her from Martha??? .... I think of her now and again ..... I know her need to be here is over but I still wonder about how she is doing ...... or Melissa (Kendall) ..... I remember her partner Debbie was facing some serious health challenges including a possible amputation .... I pray things are alright !!

                      Hope everyone is enjoying a few lazy summer days and remember .... don't forget to wear sunscreen ...... http://www.davidpbrown.co.uk/poetry/mary-schmich.html ..........

                      Obieone
                      Last edited by Obieone; 25 Jul 2008, 1:20 PM.
                      ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                      " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                      Jane Siberry

                      Comment


                        Hi everyone. I originally thought I shouldnt leave a message on this particular thread(or whatever you call it) because Im not quite in the best of moods.

                        However, since Ive recently been writing and some may call it a journal. I call it a way to vent. I thought maybe Id take a chance. This is my first time on this site and I decided to join in hope of communication from people in a common situiation that could maybe relate, provide advice or possibly be supportive.

                        Im a 1st year caregiver of a mother who had a stroke, I have had another one of those crazy days of not feeling I can do anything right or just not able to ever do enough. I am an only child of a single parent and although my mother has many many siblings which has provided for a large family I still feel Im in this all alone. Today I spent most of the day w/my mom filling out paperwork for our new place, which is handicapp accesible. Getting her in and out of the car was an adventure in itself. Since coming home, Ive been busy w/cooking, cleaning, phone calls and the drained feeling I seem to carry alot. Believe it or not my mother has a gambling addition(yes even now) that I can't get her to stop. She continuously makes me feel guilty when I dont help her to get to these event or when I dont feel up to helping her when she comes home from these events. It surprises me that she can even do it, being that she is considered disabled, can barely use the right side of her body and cant wash, clothe or clean herself when using the restroom. I know its her way of feeling alive, I guess... But, where does this leave me, other than just adding extra stress and guilt on me. Sorry so long wended, but this is my first time. If Im in the wrong thread/forum please lead me in the right direction if you can and accept my apologies for wasting anyones time.

                        Comment


                          Welcome Care4me34 ! No no your in the right thread. The Journal was started simply to share the every day goings on in our lives ... laugh ... cry and generally share a moment. If you have a very specific question than just start your own thread and you'll get responses related to just that situation. If you read back through this thread you'll see we cover alot of territory!

                          So ... you have alot going on there with your Mom ! Complicated family dynamics, a disability and an addiction to boot. Did you know senior women are among the fastest growing demographic as far as a gambling addiction goes .... I've done a bit of reading on some Addiction recovery web sites .... Google it and you'll see what I mean. I have a couple of family members teetering on the cusp of addiction myself ..... its very unsettling !

                          The guilt issue seems to go hand in hand with caring for someone within a family who is disabled regardless of whether it is a spouse, a child or a parent. If you let it .. it will rule your world and you must do everything in your pwer to prevent that. If you don't allow time for yourself and recharge those batteries you'll be no good to anyone. When you have something going on come here and let it out ..... use and abuse us at will. If you have something of a personal nature to deal with and wish to keep it more private ... go into your profile and join the Caregivers user group and then you'll be able to post in the Caregivers Forum in Members. Posting there keeps it out of the public domain !

                          I'm sorry that you had to but I am glad you found us ... you'll find lots of support and info here. Most of us are dealing with family with a sci but the issues are the same.

                          Obieone
                          ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                          " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                          Jane Siberry

                          Comment


                            Thank you so much for responding and for the information to go along. I appreciate you for giving me some insight as to how things work around here. I definately need and appreciate any insight given to me, especially during such a trying time.

                            I hope you will continue to be inspired to be there for others like me and I hope there will always be someone there for you! God bless!

                            Comment


                              where is that pipe????

                              Who is hoarding it? I don't think I've had a turn and I need it badly. I've just barely made it through a weekend of two little girls with lice.

                              My head itches just thinking about it. I spent hours cleaning house, pulling nits and lice out of hair, doing laundry and now I sit here at work and itch like crazy. I know its all in my head. I've been through my hair time and time again and have found nothing. I even had most of it cut off yesterday just to make it easier to find those little buggers.

                              Must find that pipe to settle me down!!!!


                              Anyone have any horrible lice stories to make me feel better? Let me know I'm not the only crazy one here. Or maybe I am the only crazy.

                              errrrrwwwww, I itch like mad!

                              Comment


                                Oh man .... do I remember lice !! When my kids were in elementary it seemed at the beginning of every school year we would get a note home warning parents to check their kids heads for lice because they had been discovered in the school !! It would drive me crazy thinking about it and I would go into a complete frenzy washing everything in hot hot water and picking in my kids hair like a mama monkey looking for the litter beggars!!

                                Somehow we survived it but it was one of the memories from my kids youth that I could have lived without (except maybe for the worms episode ) You have my sympathy Kap ... but try not to over stress about it this too shall pass I swear.... but I know what an unpleasant experience it is .... hang in there ..... and as soon as I find that dad-blasted pipe I'll fill 'er up, light 'er up and pass it on !!

                                Obieone
                                ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                                " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                                Jane Siberry

                                Comment

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