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    Labor Day, 8:45 pm

    Ah. Writing from the desk in our dining room, scarred old oak thing that once belonged to Bruce's grandfather. Next to it is a bookcase full of computer-ish stuff that only Bruce understands, a couple of almanacs, an AA big book, and (for reasons I don't understand!) an old toy volkswagen beetle.

    Next to that is the hated lift--a platform style thing made of white-painted metal with an old Seattle Mariners poster taped to the side. We despise the lift. We want to have someone come and haul it out of our house forever. We want carpet again.

    Sigh.

    Bruce has gone to pick up our 14-yr-old Heather at Bumbershoot--the annual labor day weekend arts/music festival. It's one of those deals where your kid is with people who don't know enough to come home at a decent hour, so you have to go and get them yourself. In the old days, before we even had kids, he and I used to go to Bumbershoot and stay out as long as we could still dance. [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img] As I wrote this paragraph, the garage door opener started to grind. They're home! [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img] Safe again.

    For the new people--everyone can post on this thread. It's meant to keep us all in a kind of long-distance, virtual over the backyard fence conversation. [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img]

    Comment


      I can't believe it's the middle of September already! This summer just flew by. Hope all of you are well, and just busy, like me...

      Obie, Bri is doing FANTASTIC on her own! She loves her apartment, she loves her classes, even Speech class ( [img]/forum/images/smilies/eek.gif[/img]), she's made friends with the guys in the apartment next door (they help her take out her garbage!) and she's LOVING it. I don't think she'll ever come home! But her happiness has made my "Empty Nest" experience virtually painless..so all is well. She also has new doctors on board, which was the trickiest part of the move, I think. So many docs are not accepting new patients! It's amazing..

      As for me, I'm officially working full time at the library and enjoying myself. Lots of challenges, which I love.

      How's life treating everyone else? Check in!

      Vicky
      ____________________________
      "God warns us not to love any earthly thing above Himself, and yet He sets in a mother's heart such a fierce passion for her babes that I do not comprehend how He can test us so."
      ~Geraldine Brooks, "Year of Wonders"


      "Be kind...for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
      ~Philo of Alexandria

      Comment


        Bump

        Ladies hello?

        JimmyMack
        JimmyMack
        Member: New Jersey Commission on Spinal Cord Reasearch
        http://www.state.nj.us/health/spinalcord/index.shtml

        Comment


          This good old thread, yeesh. Here's my latest:

          I'm on a jury in Federal court in Seattle. We're in the 2nd week of what's going to be an 8-week trial. There are 10 defendants and 13 lawyers and a humorous judge. It's a criminal case with 105 separate counts on four charges, and about 20 boxes of evidence.

          There are undercover tapes, witnesses from all over creation, oy. I'm dying, dying, dying to talk about it and I can't. But it takes up a lot of space in my head.

          What's up with the rest of you?

          Comment


            Ah, JimmyMack, you are the kick in the pants we need! [img]/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif[/img]

            Kate, I've been on jury duty quite a bit, and I've sat on five different juries..but never a Federal case. I've always found it extremely interesting, which is good, because I have some kinda luck when it comes to being chosen for jury duty!!

            Brianna still loves school and living on her own. The money is flying out of my checking account..but it's all good.

            I got married on Oct. 16th, and you can see pictures and read the romantic story in "Member Pictures"..."My wedding pics". So far, after almost a month, married life is good... [img]/forum/images/smilies/tongue.gif[/img] I'm still working full time, still busy...still trying to get my German Sheps to let me clip their nails...

            I guess I'm not really a caregiver anymore, you know? I don't think occasional grocery shopping and doing laundry counts; I think that's more Mom stuff.

            Anyone else??
            Vicky
            ____________________________
            "God warns us not to love any earthly thing above Himself, and yet He sets in a mother's heart such a fierce passion for her babes that I do not comprehend how He can test us so."
            ~Geraldine Brooks, "Year of Wonders"


            "Be kind...for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
            ~Philo of Alexandria

            Comment


              Kate, I hope the outcome in your case justifies the time you're putting into it. About 4 years ago I was on a jury for 5 weeks in a suit against Honda for product liability resulting in a death. We found for the plaintiff to the tune of $80 million ($65mil plus interest). Unfortunately our time was wasted as the appeals court (who doesn't actually HEAR the case but only reads the briefs and rules on the points of law much to my surprise) threw it out. Why make 15 of us sit through 5 weeks of crap when they could have done that in the beginning without the time and expense of a trial? My faith in "the system" was totally shattered and no longer exists.

              Comment


                Ahhhhhh all better!
                JimmyMack
                Member: New Jersey Commission on Spinal Cord Reasearch
                http://www.state.nj.us/health/spinalcord/index.shtml

                Comment


                  OMG, Martha. That is completely demoralizing; if we decide this case and it gets tossed on appeal I'll be pissed. Things move along very slowly, partly because the material is complex (money/taxes/investments) and partly because the technology they're using to show us the evidence is, uh, under construction, to use the polite term, and partly because three of the defendants are acting as their own attorneys.

                  They're wildly off the mark with about a third of what they're trying to do, and the judge keeps having to stop the proceedings and rein them in. It's all interesting. It's really interesting to be with 15 strangers hour after hour and not be able to discuss the very thing we all have in common.

                  Comment


                    Yes Vicky the pants are duly kicked ..... thanks Jimm ...

                    My 87 year old mother-in-law was called to jury duty very recently but we pleaded her case not to be included in the selection ... which they were happy to oblige to (not) do since : a. her elderliness is becoming more evident and I think she would have had a difficult time forming an opinion and b. she would be 1700 miles away on a holiday [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] .... such an awesome responsibility Kate ... all the best with it!

                    Finally decided to share some family photos with everyone in CC (see Memb Pics) and have a had a strange sense of "coming out"! After all the years of coming here I've resisted posting pics partly out of a feeling of vulnerability and partly to protect my family's privacy ... well the truth is CC has been a very large part of my everyday life over the last 6 years and it seems to have sealed the relationship in some odd way. Plus I received a letter from Patricia saying she and Wise had received Kat's and my tape for the Rally (way late) etc. etc. . Suddenly I felt very connected to everyone in a way I hadn't before .... I dunno ....

                    Bill is waiting on word for yet another surgery to remove the mesh from his belly and do a flap to close the "never" healing belly incison [img]/forum/images/smilies/frown.gif[/img] ... its a risky procedure and I guess I'm simply resigned to just yet another curve ball .... can only imagine what must go through Bill's mind in the dark of night ...

                    Other than that everything else is sort of okay ... Julie turns 18 tomorrow ..... [img]/forum/images/smilies/eek.gif[/img] how the heck did that happen and where was I ...

                    Stay strong all!
                    Obieone [img]/forum/images/smilies/cool.gif[/img]
                    ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                    " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                    Jane Siberry

                    Comment


                      Where has the time gone?
                      Kate, I think you are allowed to spill the beans once the trial has concluded, so be sure to take notes and share later. I have been called to jury duty several times, but was never able to serve. Have heard it can be quite boring, guess I will find out some day.

                      Obie, you all have sure had your share, hope all goes well and you find your way to total recovery. We are struggling here with health issues again and it is frustrating to be sure. I would post photos if I could figure out how, good for you, can't wait to check them out.

                      Vicky, I am very happy for you and your family...you are so deserving of the many positive changes in your lives, what a joy!

                      If hubby can work his way through his current discomfort and pain we are supposed to visit our children in Bloomington. The weather doesn't look promising so we will bag the football game. Goodness I found myself tearing up thinking about seeing the kids, I miss them so...

                      I have been actively interviewing for a new job and was disappointed to learn I was no longer in contention for the position I was most interested in, but am hopeful I still have a shot at the other two. This process is exhausting and the stress is giving me awful indigestion, grrrr. I created a bit of a stir yesterday when I stretched out on the conference room floor after popping in the office for a meeting. I was trying to alleviate the pain from an old fashioned stomach ache.

                      Miss you all and look forward to hearing what you have been about lately.
                      Kath
                      Kath

                      Comment


                        I'm so glad to see this thread continue and I'm sure it will be ok to jump in and join the group. I have been hopeing to see more threads here in Caregiving but it has been lonly for a while, thanks, JimmyMack.
                        Obieone, I know what you mean about feeling connected to everyone here. For me also this site is my everyday contact with the world that understands.
                        My son and I both started this semester on-line through the local college. He is doing well with it but I was not able to continue and dropped for this semester. I get very depressed still and cry way too much. I tried an antidepressant med but it was way too much of a drugged feeling for me. Besides, being depressed when situations in life are depressing may be a sign of mental health.
                        I also got a notice for jury duty but fortunately they accepted my caregiving as a valid excuse. My son insists that I can leave for longer than an hour but I am so uncomfortable about the danger that for my own peace of mind I stay close. I hope that the Scott Peterson verdict is not overturned by the slick ones who have damaged our system so but I have a suspicion that it will be. My heart aches for Laci's mom. People talk about "closure" but I imagine that doesn't exist for her. I am happy my son is alive and that he has me to care for him.
                        Darthe
                        "A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner"

                        Comment


                          Darthe said:

                          I get very depressed still and cry way too much. I tried an antidepressant med but it was way too much of a drugged feeling for me. Besides, being depressed when situations in life are depressing may be a sign of mental health.
                          You could be on to something here Darthe [img]/forum/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img] !! ... except for the crying part ... I do believe I'm totally cried out for now [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] .... and on Sat. nite I allow myself to over indulge in the now infamous Chilean chardonnay and somehow I have stayed sane ... you hang in there ya' hear ...

                          Our current financial situation has forced us to put our fully wheelchair accessable house (built apres Bill's injury) up for sale so we can move somewhere where I can find a full time job in order to support our family .... its not looking like Bill will be employed in any meaningful way for at least the next two years and hasn't been working for the past two years since he's been sick and his pension and my part time bank job just don't cut it ... so ... well ... you do the math ... our little town is only 800 souls large so full time employment of "any" kind is scarce .... its sink or swim ... had someone come look at the house today and I'm kind of really hoping they buy it so we can regroup and start over ... only problem is all our support system is "HERE" ... more wine [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] !

                          Share what you're comfortable with ... we'll pass the pipe around ... maybe we can help ... this is Sanctuary ... never forget that ...

                          Obieone [img]/forum/images/smilies/cool.gif[/img]
                          ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                          " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                          Jane Siberry

                          Comment


                            By the way .. ditto on the Scott Peterson case ... it's always so hard for me to believe such "evil" is present in our everyday world .... I don't believe in the death penalty ... I think death is too kind for the likes of him ... I'd much rather have him live out his life in prison "living" with what he has done ... facing his family and their sorrow ... to me that is a far crueller (sp) punishment for him to endure ... of course that assumes he's actually a "normal" human being and would even recognize their pain ...

                            Obie [img]/forum/images/smilies/cool.gif[/img]
                            ~ Be the change you wish to see in the world ~ Mahatma Gandi


                            " calling all Angels ...... calling all Angels ....walk me through this one .. don't leave me alone .... calling all Angels .... calling all Angels .... we're tryin' and we're hopin' cause we're not sure how ....... this .... goes ..."
                            Jane Siberry

                            Comment


                              Darthe, Welcome to the 'journal'; I hope that this will be an ongoing journal for anyone who wants or needs it. My hope is that the 'newbies' here can take some comfort in finding those of us who have been through similar situations, felt the same feelings, and are now learning to move on with their lives. If the 'journal' serves no other purpose than to provide some hope, then Martha, our heroine! [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img] will have done a truly good deed!

                              We'll all found solace, and tears, and laughs and giggles here, as well as practical solutions to our lives. My sincerest hope is that you will also.

                              _____________
                              If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. - Mother Teresa
                              _____________

                              Comment


                                Marm, that's sweet but don't forget it was Kate's idea, not mine! So kudos to Kate.

                                Darthe, welcome. I hope you find some outlet here as I did over the past few years.

                                Probably everyone knows by now, but for any who don't, I moved to Florida in July. I really needed a change of scenery after Julian died and this has been a wonderful move for me. However, as much as I love my house, I'm wondering if it's the money pit. I'm now working on the bathroom from Hell. The small guest bath was a disaster so I tore it back to the studs, pulled out the old fiberglass tub in pieces after attacking it with a sawsall and have been trying to rebuild the whole room. After leveling the ceiling (kind of) and walls (sort of) and putting up bead board and new vanity/sink, rewiring, new lights, etc. I'm to the point of plumbing the new bathtub. I've never done the copper pipe soldering thing so I'll need lots of luck on this one! I hope I don't end up having to call in a plumber since they make about 5 times per hour what I do! [img]/forum/images/smilies/eek.gif[/img]

                                While I've done most construction projects over the years, Julian was a contractor and I'm really pissed at him for not being here to do this stupid plumbing! How unfair is that. But Darthe, it just shows that the depression and tears are normal and don't just stop because you've reached a specific date on the calendar.

                                martha

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