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    Gosh Kate, returning to the site takes tremendous courage. It's as if you are spitting in the face of evil and celebrating the beauty of love and kindness all at once.

    SciMom, how did you travel this same road day after day?

    Krajaxa, I bought a dining room table at a garage sale 23 years ago...it was temporary and it's still here. Good luck and have fun shopping. I always thought those books should have been called shopping is good for the soul, not chicken soup.

    Martha, I asked my husband how he would like it if I also used the family room as a bathroom. Today was "accident" day, guess who was on cleanup duty? Three loads of laundry, washed twice each. Always makes me grumpy. Well, thanks for listening everyone, I must get back to work. Night all.
    Kath

    Comment


      Ladies , i have a more radical suggestion , send hubby out to stay with me for a while , it would be a pretty crooked real estate agent [ no shot intended at you] , that would describe my house as fully accessable , if you have an ''accident '' it is either clean it up yourself or live with it and if you want to eat , it's ''catch and kill your own '' . i am envious of the lucky spoilt husbands of you ladies .

      thank you
      dogger

      P.S. i think within 2 days you would be getting a HELP call , especially when the ''work for your board '' clause kicked in . [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

      every day i wake up is a good one .
      Every day I wake up is a good one .

      Comment


        Hey Dogger, how about we leave them all home and all of us come stay with you instead?

        Comment


          Martha , for me , thoughts like that are the stuff dreams are made of ![img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

          thank you
          dogger

          every day i wake up is a good one .
          Every day I wake up is a good one .

          Comment


            Great idea about the 'steps program', guys, and I've started a new topic for it:


            http://carecure.org/forum/showthread.php?t=10615

            _____________
            Tough times don't last - tough people do.
            _____________

            Comment


              Dogger, remember dreams can turn into nightmares. By the time the whole group got there, we'd no doubt have you preferring to live with the sheep. [img]/forum/images/smilies/eek.gif[/img] Although I have to say, being isolated on 20,000 acres sounds good after suburbia and freeways and traffic. While don't you open a DA training ranch where we can send them and you can educate them in the ways of the DA world. I think that would be a marvelous idea and I might even promise to send him with a roundtrip ticket. Maybe.

              Comment


                LOL, Martha - for a minute I thought you meant a ranch to train DA! [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

                Dogger, do you use dogs to herd the sheep? We have a sheltie, and tho we've never 'trained' him, he tries to herd us around everywhere; likes for us all to be in one room together! I've watched trials for border collies and other herding dogs, and I think they're absolutely amazing!!

                Folks - do you realize we have 11 pages on this topic? WooHoo!

                _____________
                Tough times don't last - tough people do.
                _____________

                Comment


                  Can't you see all of us spoiling dogger?? Caregivers, trained to wait on someone hand and foot...and only one man between all of us? (There, dogger...that should keep you smilin' for a while! [img]/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif[/img] )

                  I have to say I love this journal, all eleven pages! This has been good for me...

                  I'm heading outside into the 50+ degree weather to clear out the cobwebs...but I'll be back. It's been a weird couple of days, and I need to vent, plus comment on how I was able to drive past Bri's accident site without losing my sanity...

                  Vicky
                  ____________________________
                  "God warns us not to love any earthly thing above Himself, and yet He sets in a mother's heart such a fierce passion for her babes that I do not comprehend how He can test us so."
                  ~Geraldine Brooks, "Year of Wonders"


                  "Be kind...for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
                  ~Philo of Alexandria

                  Comment


                    LOL, martha & dogger. I agree dogger would would go insane having all this women around him... so dogger, just dream on (you can control dreams to be nice... [img]/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif[/img]).
                    We should be having another 11 or more pages to go, I suggest somebody just writes it as a book when there is about 200 pages of this stuff...
                    I had the "laudry" day yesterday, I think I'm like a machine when "accident" happens, help him in a shower, get clean clothes, stick the "wet" stuff straight in washer and turn it on...
                    [img]/forum/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

                    Oh, I really had good time today, I went to an estate auction, hubby came along for a while, but after couple of hours him and our friend gave up and went to our house, and me and my girl-friend stayed and enjoyed ourselves for another two hours (I should do this every week)!!! [img]/forum/images/smilies/tongue.gif[/img] And it turned out to be 54 degrees, so even standing outside in a pile of mud in somebody's yeard was great time.

                    That's enough writing...let mi check out the "steps program", I need some more ideas...

                    k
                    [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img]
                    http://www.tickercentral.com/view/2qot/2.png

                    http://www.geocities.com/krajaxa/fair05copy.jpg

                    Comment


                      Marmaladay , i use sheepdogs [ at the moment i have 2 grown border collies and one kelpie( an Australian breed with a splash of dingo in them ) pup ] to muster [ round up ] my cattle , goats and sheep .what you see your dog doing should be natural instinct to them , we watch pups for signs of it when trying to decide if they have talent or not .
                      Martha , your thoughts on a DA training centre are too late . i offered but because there did not seem to be much interest i have since changed my mind . i have now decided i will open an intense training centre for young , nubile , attractive , inexperienced , nymphomaniac devos ! and charge them like wounded bulls [ both financially and physically ] for the experience . move over Hugh Heffner ! [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]/forum/images/smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

                      thank you
                      dogger

                      every day i wake up is a good one .
                      Every day I wake up is a good one .

                      Comment


                        Tuesday morning...

                        And I wake up to SNOW!! Okay, I thought we were DONE with this! (Deep breaths...relaxing, pleasant thoughts...more deep breaths...)Okay, I'm better now. I'm assuming that this will all melt by NOON....

                        Let's see, yesterday I took Bri into Elkins to the Davis & Elkins College so she could take her midterm. (They proctored the exam for her; she's taking a class online from Washtenaw Community College in Ann Arbor). She's got a B+/A- in the class and it's killing her...she's a 4.0 student (don't you hate people like this?? [img]/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif[/img] )

                        I went to one of our local libraries a few weeks ago, got chatting with the director of the library, and it ended with him asking me to bring in my resume...so I think I'll do that today. Something always pops up when you're not looking, doesn't it? I'm enjoying my freedom right now, and they're not looking to hire anyone for 4-6 months. This could work out well.

                        Monday is the big day...Divorce court! I've had two panicky phone calls from friends saying they're worried about my soon-to-be ex; he's saying things that are making them think he might be considering suicide. I can't begin to describe the feelings here, so I won't even try...just keep venting here, I guess!

                        Kath~It was so hard to drive by Bri's accident site. At first, I would have actual physical reactions: nausea, cold sweat, shaking hands. "Her whole life changed in an instant in that blessed corn field!" was all I could think...that, and "WHY?" It gradually got better, but I never was able to drive by without, at the least, such a heavy heart.

                        Martha~Hope things are going better for you this week! Any success on the 10-step program for you? Or anyone?

                        Kate~I'm glad the trip was successful; and good for you for becoming such an activist!!!

                        Dogger~What can I say?? You crack me up!!

                        How's life going for everyone else?

                        Vicky
                        ____________________________
                        "God warns us not to love any earthly thing above Himself, and yet He sets in a mother's heart such a fierce passion for her babes that I do not comprehend how He can test us so."
                        ~Geraldine Brooks, "Year of Wonders"


                        "Be kind...for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
                        ~Philo of Alexandria

                        Comment


                          Vicky, good luck with your St. Patrick's Day celebration going smoothly. And remember, the ex's mental health is not your responsibility. His friends should be calling his family or a health care professional if they are concerned. It sounds like they are trying to make you feel guilty and you should be shedding all of those feelings for good! (I say this as an experienced carrier of the world's guilt [img]/forum/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]) Move ahead -- not backwards by worrying about him.

                          On the 10-step program, I'm resolved to being a doormat. Always have been, always will be. What I need to really do is stop bitching about it.

                          Comment


                            Tuesday 1:50 pm

                            March 11th--all week I've been thinking about "two years ago" . . . two years ago today I almost fainted in the neuro icu hallway when a well-meaning nurse told me that Bruce's inability to breathe might last for the rest of his life. I remember putting my head between my knees and waiting for the black dots to clear . . .

                            It's almost time for the girls to be home from school. I've been doing some work on the various projects I've come to think privately of as "cure-this-mother-right-now!" for most of the afternoon. Plus I'm reading this book about a man who suffered a TBI in Ontario in 1996, when some teenager drove a speedboat into his head. The author is his wife, Cathy Crimmins. It makes for odd reading, because it kind of resembles the book I'm working on myself--except I'm completely disciplined about staying in the moment of things exactly as they happened, not giving the reader any breaks that I didn't get myself. I didn't know how it would all turn out! (I still don't.) She keeps jumping ahead of her story, which I find bothersome. Also--I had a partner who died of a brain tumor in 1977 after a couple of months of extremely erratic and bizarre behavior, so I know the symptoms she's describing. It's weird for me to be thinking of these two scenarios at once--I don't often connect them.

                            Martha, honey, doormat you are not! No way, no how. I've read too many of your blessed, feisty posts to ever buy that. [img]/forum/images/smilies/smile.gif[/img]

                            Got to get the ninth-grader . . .

                            Comment


                              Thanks, Martha...you're right. Nobody said this was going to be easy, and if I want my freedom (which I do) I have to go through the fire...Hell, I'm familiar with fire! Aren't we all?

                              I agree with Kate, btw...you, a doormat? Can't picture it! A softie who rescues those in need, whether they have two legs or four? Well...maybe! [img]/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif[/img]

                              Vicky

                              P.S. I should know for sure about the Caregivers Gone Bad weekend after my trip to Michigan...I'll let you know.
                              ____________________________
                              "God warns us not to love any earthly thing above Himself, and yet He sets in a mother's heart such a fierce passion for her babes that I do not comprehend how He can test us so."
                              ~Geraldine Brooks, "Year of Wonders"


                              "Be kind...for everyone you meet is fighting a great battle."
                              ~Philo of Alexandria

                              Comment


                                Well, folks, here's the reason I've been a little quiet lately - our aide has been ill with something - they've run every test under the sun and can't find anything. She's been out over two weeks, and just had me help her file disability this week. As it took two years to find her, it'll be like finding the proverbial needle in a haystack to get someone to fill her place. Sooooo,

                                As of this Friday, I'm resigning my job at Children's. Hate to do it, but I don't have any choice. I can't keep getting Matt up at 5:30, so I can get dressed and be at work on time, and he gets to spend the whole day by himself. He's exhausted; it's 6:30 now, and he's ready for bed! He's also got some biggie appontments coming up - physiatry re-eval, cysto, etc. Plus - the good news in all this - he's been accepted into a cognitive remediation program at Kessler, which is a pretty intensive deal - 3 days a week, 5 hours a day; so I'll have to be there at the facility all day.

                                Plus - we've changed the management company for the trust fund, so I've had to deal with more finances than I ever in my life thought i would; plus I'm just sick at how much the trust has lost because of the (*#($*%&#(*$&%^ stock market. That's being remedied, so hopefully the money hemorrhage will stop.

                                Plus - we've had plumbers and masons here fixing the basement.

                                So, that's been my two weeks in a nutshell!

                                On the lighter side, yesterday there were about a dozen deer in the yard scrounging in the remaining snow for something to eat. All I had in the fridge was a package of old corn tortillas, so hubbie and I stood on the deck and 'frisbeed' them out to the deer, who actually caught a few in midair! Now we know deer like tortillas!!

                                Martha - doormat - NOT! I've got your answer, tho - you just need to be as feisty with hubbie as you are on the forums! [img]/forum/images/smilies/wink.gif[/img]

                                Vicky, i've got my fingers crossed!

                                _____________
                                Tough times don't last - tough people do.
                                _____________

                                Comment

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