When you forget how to open a door - venting

[triumph]

Grommet: I can't believe you do not have one friend to act as confidant/co-manager of your important health issues. "I'd rather do it myself": Does that attitude really work for someone with an impairment of organizational type skills?
Do you realize you are guessing that the person will be "bothered"? If they truly are bothered they are not the right person for the job. And, it is a job that you can repay the person with a nice meal, gift, etc.
I agree that the healthcare system can be vastly improved for disabled persons. Recently had annual physical in a tiny room that was the only one with a low table for transfer. The doctor had to climb over my wheelchair twice to get around. I was secretly chuckeling.

[grommet]

Triumph, I have a partner who has asked and sometimes I have asked to come with me for health appointments and she has been an angel. She went with me when I went to a new clinic and see the process about signing up. Each time the interviewer asked questions and I was confused I looked at my partner and she answered for me. It was great and I really appreciate she did that. She has been there when I needed oral surgery, a crazy last minute thing that had her leaving work early and running across town. She took me to the pharmacy after and stayed with me. She's done that other times too. She took me to a cancer screening, an appointment I was nervous about for months. She helped me figure out how to find the right room and how to sign in. So I have asked for and gotten help. I just don't want to overburden her or other people (before I met my partner I had others take me to appointments). I am not alone.

I try to keep my asking for help for the serious things, things I just don't think I could manage on my own. My friends help me a lot but I don't want to only be the guy who is going to need something so I try and censor. I think we all do that. I think it's one thing that CC is good for, reaching out to peers. Thank you for your concern.

It's funny how over the years, people who care about me have just gotten completely used to how I function. I am surrounded by people who accept me. That's really wonderful :-)

Grommet: I can't believe you do not have one friend to act as confidant/co-manager of your important health issues. "I'd rather do it myself": Does that attitude really work for someone with an impairment of organizational type skills?
Do you realize you are guessing that the person will be "bothered"? If they truly are bothered they are not the right person for the job. And, it is a job that you can repay the person with a nice meal, gift, etc.
I agree that the healthcare system can be vastly improved for disabled persons. Recently had annual physical in a tiny room that was the only one with a low table for transfer. The doctor had to climb over my wheelchair twice to get around. I was secretly chuckeling.

[triumph]

Thanks for clarifying. It sounds like you have some good strategies that work for you. I do like Sue Pendleton's suggestion of cognitive therapy. Since you said your brain damage was since birth, and you are middle-age, there must be major advances since you had any help like this when you were growing up.

[triumph]

P.S. CC is a great "support group" in addition to an in-person one.

[grommet]

Seeing a someone a CBT this week. If I learn something I can share about therapies I will post to this thread. It's been such a part of my life I don't know much different except seeing how other people live. A joke I guess I've been telling myself since I was young is that when I am old and my mind goes, who will know the difference ;-) Heck I'll have the advantage because for them it'll be something new. Recent example - I spent all day yesterday with my partner but today I only know that because of the date on the calendar. In my mind I know we were together recently, which could mean within the last week or two months. Of course other things are crystal clear, like when I was ten and we moved into a new house and had to use a special floor cleaner. I remember it was Trisodium Phosphate (TSP) and needed warm water to work on our wood floors. How that helps me in life I don't know but that's what my brain gives me ;-) Oh what fun.

Thanks for clarifying. It sounds like you have some good strategies that work for you. I do like Sue Pendleton's suggestion of cognitive therapy. Since you said your brain damage was since birth, and you are middle-age, there must be major advances since you had any help like this when you were growing up.